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Printed from https://web1.writing.com/main/books/action/view/entry_id/1087534
by Seffi Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ · Book · Contest Entry · #2338830

Collection of flash-fiction pieces - most 300/500 words, contest entries

#1087534 added April 24, 2025 at 8:57am
Restrictions: None
The Jade Rabbit
Competition Notes

“Got ya, ya little pest.”
“Excuse me. What did you just call me? I am NOT a pest. And… will you please get this confounded pot off me.”
“Who said that?”
“I did.”
“Who…?”
“Good grief…. I AM UNDER the planter.”
“Wh.. Wot the hell…?”
“Yes… Hello… Down here…. Well done. If you could just lift it up. That’s it…. Wonderful.”
“Wot… Who…. Wot… huh?”
“Communication is not your strong suite is it?”
“You’re a bunny... A talkin bunny…”
“Rabbit, but yes… Did the long ears and fluffy tail give it away? They usually do. Glad to see your eyes are in working order. Clearly it is just your cognitive functions that are impaired.”
“Why is there a talkin bun… Why are ya… Why are ya in me yard.”
“I fell.”
“From where?”
“Up there.”
“Up where?”
“Up there.”
“Space? You’re a SPACE bunny?”
“A space bunny? Really…? Know of many space bunnies, do you?”
“I don’t know many bunnies at all…. Especially not talkin ones.”
“It shows... And no, I am not a space bunny. Though I do come from the moon.”
“The moon?”
“Yes, that big white thing in the sky. It is called the moon. Try and keep up.”
“I know wot it’s called.”
“Ah… Well… Easy mistake to make. You seemed confused.”
“Of course I’m confused! There’s a green, talkin bunny in me backyard.”
“Jade.”
“WOT?”
“I am not green, I am jade.”
“Fff…Same fing.”
“Only to people with limited perception and no understanding of colour.”
“I musta banged me head. That’s the only explanation…”
“Did you just pat me… I am NOT a... YOU do NOT get to pet… PUT ME DOWN THIS INSTANT!”
“Woteva ya say little talkin bunny.”
“I am dealing with an idiot…”
“Why’re ya hard, ya’re not soft like a normal bunny?”
“Because I am a JADE rabbit. I am MADE of jade.”
“Huh…”
“I feel a migraine coming on.”
“So, are ya real, or… Wot are ya?”
“For the love of... I. Am. The. Jade. Rabbit. I live on the moon.”
“Well, why are ya here then? In m’ backyard... Eatin m’ hibiscus.”
“I was NOT eating it. I landed in it.”
“That doesn’t explain why ya are here… on Earth.”
“I was minding my own business…. mixing my immortality elixir, when I got distracted by a solar flare. I must have tripped over my paws…and….”
“They ARE rather large...”
“OF course they are. I am a rabbit. This is very painful.”
“Well, how do we get ya back to the moon…. a rocket? And, did ya say immortality?”
“With your obvious cognitive impairment I would not trust you with explosives. And if you put me down, I can make my own way home.”
“How?”
“I am a mystical jade rabbit. I HAVE my ways.”
“Fair enough...”
“Will I… see… ya again?”
“Yes…. If you look up at the full moon, you will see me. Now, put me down.”
“Off ya go then little bunny...”
“Goodbye, poor, defective human.”
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