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My thoughts released; a mind set free |
| I restarted my chemo infusions today after a month break to recover from the two I had after surgery; they knocked me down, kicked my ass, and left me feeling like I was wading in the river Styx trying to avoid some guy in a boat. But after a month, I was feeling pretty damn good. I wasn't healed or over the damage chemo inflicts, but I was heading in that direction. I suppose I could say I had found the bank and was halfway out of the river, with one leg on the shore and one still in the water. Oh, and it seemed I'd ditched the dude in the boat. Now, after six hours of infusions, then a portable pump to infuse the last batch of poison over the next twenty-four hours, I find I've slid off the bank and landed on my ass in the river, again. It's not as bad as it was, but I'm feeling pretty rough. I'm hoping the steroids I take tomorrow and the next day do their job and help me feel better. If they do, great; if not, I'll suffer a bit for the next few days or maybe a week. No matter, it's bearable; I think it feels worse because I had the break. It sounds very positive that I will only have one more infusion in two weeks, then the chemo part is over. However, I do need to have some tests run, some scans done, and talk to my oncologist before the next infusion. There is a slight possibility that I may have to do two more because he reduced my infusions down to 70% since they were tearing me up so badly. I'm sticking with Oddball's outlook on this battle, especially since so many of you are sending me positive waves: "Crazy! I mean like so many positive waves maybe we can't lose! You're on!" from the film "Kelly's Heroes". Like Oddball, I have to express optimism and hope during a challenging time. |
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