Gemini Rising

50 STB - Sweetie the BIG FAT Bison -- South Dakota

The Party Bus made it to Rapid City, South Dakota and Maid of the Mist Most Macabre found a 7-11. She recharged her 64 oz Big Gulp. Šuŋgmánitu Tȟáŋka went to visit his mother’s family in Rosebud, South Dakota.

After we stocked up on pastries and coffee, the Party Bus was off. A Warped Witch I Be took over the driving and took us on the 31 mile loop of Badlands National Park. Me and Krista rolled down the windows and stuck our faces out so we could feel the wind on our cheeks. One of the things that really impressed me was how desolate the land looked. There were flat prairies and odd rock formations. It reminded me of the Pinnacles hike at Camp 3 Falls in the Los Padres National forest. The rocks were steep, almost white and in a way reminded me of stalactites.

A Warped Witch I Be took us the Fossil Exhibit trail where we got out and walked around. It’s a trail that has a wooden boardwalk for us hikers to walk on so we don’t disturb the dirt, wildlife, and rugged terrain. Well, AmyJo-Zombie hours took her Nalgene and was just kinda walking along oohing and ahhing at the low hanging clouds and rock pinnacles when a BIG FAT BISON with HUGE ASS HORNS appeared next to the walkway out of nowhere and made a wicked high pitched grunt startling the hell out of her. Well she bolted behind me, Giant Phantom Jelly and WakeUpAndLive~NOV Word Monger (Don’t ask me why!) and her Nalgene went flying into the air and fell in a little dip on the other side of the walkway.

Princess Megan Snow Rose channeled her inner bison whisperer and the buffalo stopped grunting and bleating and sat down right next to her on the walkway. Then that BIG FAT BISON let Princess Megan Snow Rose pet him. Maid of the Mist Most Macabre joined Princess Megan Snow Rose and started petting the BIG FAT BISON, too. Krista got some great Instagram pictures. Everyone was amazed at how quickly the bison calmed down. Princess Megan Snow Rose just smiled and named him “Sweetie.” AmyJo-Zombie hours calmed down too but declared “Sweetie” was kinda stinky and she wanted her Nalgene back. After all, she paid $50.00 for Nalgene in Hawaii.

While Princess Megan Snow Rose was petting Sweetie, me and WakeUpAndLive~NOV Word Monger and Giant Phantom Jelly started looking over the ledge of the walkway in the direction of the Nalgene. A Warped Witch I Be spotted that wicked expensive Nalgene next to a dip by a strange looking round brown rock. We all covered for AmyJo-Zombie hours who snuck off the path. She was about six feet off the path when we heard a whistle. Oh no! Park Rangers?! AmyJo-Zombie hours scooped her Nalgene and a big handful of dirt and Giant Phantom Jelly tugged her back on the walkway just as the Park Ranger rode up on the E-Bike.

“I’m Ranger Rick.” He stopped and pointed at Princess Megan Snow Rose . “I can’t believe you got ol’ BIG ASS BUTCH over here to chill out.” He looked totally stunned.

“I’ve got the touch,” said Princess Megan Snow Rose

“Well, Ma’m, you’re a brave one. Butch does this all the time. He loves to scare the Tourists,” said the Park Ranger.

“We call him Sweetie,” said A Warped Witch I Be smiling.

“Sweetie?” the Park Ranger burst out laughing. After he calmed down, he said. “Well, it’s a pleasure to meet you all. Now, don’t leave the walking trail. There’s rattlesnakes and scorpions all around the ground, now.”

“Yes, Sir,” said WakeUpAndLive~NOV Word Monger

He drove off. AmyJo-Zombie hours looked mortified.

“Cool rock,” said Krista pointing to AmyJo-Zombie hours lump of dirt.

AmyJo-Zombie hours “Thank goodness it’s not a rattlesnake, but it’s a pretty porous rock.” She gave it to A Warped Witch I Be

A Warped Witch I Be inspected it. “This is a fossilized dinosaur egg!”

“Eeeekk!” yelled AmyJo-Zombie hours

Maid of the Mist Most Macabre declared AmyJo-Zombie hours couldn’t keep it and threw it back in the dirt.

A Warped Witch I Be pointed toward the parking lot. “We really should get going.”

So after all that drama, we visited the deserted Minuteman Missile silo which was kinda neat. There were no more missiles in the silos, but the command center was pretty compact. The equipment was all MS-DOS with big fat computer buttons out of the 1970’s.

Afterwards, we were all hungry so we went to the Badlands Visitor’s Center at the Cedar Pass Lodge and ordered lunch at the café. Everyone ordered a “White River Indian Taco” with fried bread, chili and bison meat. Giant Phantom Jelly and Princess Megan Snow Rose passed on the Taco though. They got the “Veggie Indian Taco.” Adventurous souls. The tacos were okay. Sadly, South Dakota is not a place that makes Foodies smile. I guess the food ain’t all that in this state.




We kinda wanted to see Mt. Rushmore, but after all that drama we decided to pass and went to Air BnB in Rapid City to chill out and relax before our next adventure.