Perpetual Ruminations

Time and Patients

With the removal of my esophagus, I find myself trying to adapt to a new life. For example, I cannot eat very much at one sitting; about a cup. For now, the foods need to be moist and smooth-textured. I can swallow tablet-type pills, but it's with some difficulty (I'm currently cutting them in half and putting them in a spoon of pudding. In time, I will be able to eat a bit more, but I don't know how much my stomach capacity will increase. I will also, in time, be able to eat most any type of food, as long as it's well chewed and in smaller pieces.

Another change is how I sleep. From the day of my surgery till the end of my days, I have to elevate my head and shoulders at least thirty percent. Currently, I still need to be closer to a forty-five-degree angle. My first night home, I just slept in my recliner. The wedge I had my wife order arrived yesterday, and along with one we got from my sister in law, we can adjust the angle. Last night was the first night in over two weeks that I was able to sleep in my own bed. Well, from around eleven until two-thirty: blood draw time for the daily labs.

That's one change I'm eager to overcome: getting woke up so much during the night. Now, it just happens out of habit, and I'm hoping I can change that routine and sleep through the night soon.

I have a follow-up with the surgeon next week as well as an appointment with the oncologist to find out when I return to my next four chemo infusions. He also wants to start me on immunotherapy, but I don't know if I can do that until after chemo or during (I have some research to do before the appointment).

For now, it's a bit difficult, the surgery left me with a lot of flem and coughing, which causes me to have acid reflux and often forces some of the food I've managed to eat back out. I am drinking nutritional drinks to stay healthy until I can reach a point of eating enough food and types to get my nutritional needs met.

Time, it's all going to be a slow and timely process of adjusting and healing, as well as adjusting to the life changes. Unfortunately, I've never mastered patients...