A Bad Trip to the Movies - Volume 2

A trip to the movies gone bad - The Long Walk

It was September 8th, 2025, and you are still at home sick with fucking Covid! you really wished that bastard Ross wouldn't go to the International Movie Theater so damn much and bring back horrible diseases to make people like you so goddamn sick! Seriously, 2 weeks of this shit is fucking horrible! As you start to heat up some coffee, you would get a letter in the mail! You would look over the envelope and see that it was from your wife! You started hoping that it was a letter of apology where she apologizes for being such a royal bitch to you, or apologizing because she keeps taking stuff out of your house whenever she comes over or something like that! Instead, when you open up the letter, what you read made your blood run ice cold! The letter had no apology in it whatsoever! Instead, it was your wife telling you that starting next weekend, you will be watching the kids...EVERY SINGLE WEEKEND FROM NOW ON!!!
ARE YOU GODDAMN FUCKING KIDDING ME?!? YOUR WIFE IS FORCING YOU TO GIVE UP YOUR WEEKENDS JUST TO WATCH THE LITTLE SHITS!!! NOW YOU REALLY WISHED THAT YOU HAD WORN SOME CONDOMS THE NIGHT YOU PORKED HER, OR HAD TAKEN HER ASS TO AN ABORTION CLINIC OUT OF STATE, OR BETTER YET, PULLED OUT BEFORE YOU SPILLED THE MAN GRAVY!!!

That fucking means that whenever Ross goes somewhere on the weekends, whether its to the movies, that cursed International Movie Theater, or God forbid a hockey game, YOU CAN'T LEAVE THE HOUSE AND TRY TO KICK HIS ASS!!! Such fucking bullshit!!!

On Wednesday, September 10th, 2025, you would take a look at your bank account online and see that you don't have much left!
Desperate for money, you call up the main lady that you make OnlyFans videos with and asks if she is willing to make another video where you humiliate yourself to thousands of strangers! She tells you that she can't because she isn't feeling up for it! You get a little ticked off and tell her that you need money and fast! She then tells you to just get off your ass and get a job then! As soon as she hangs up on you, memories of the day you got fired from Hooters started flooding back into your head! You remember that you tried to act like such a bad-ass when leaving the restaurant, but as soon as you got home, you immediately switch gears...


Desperate for some OnlyFans dough, you would slip on a ventilator mask to keep yourself from spreading Covid and would get an Uber ride over to the trailer park towards the trailer the woman lives in. You would storm up her porch and bang on her door quite a bit and just as you started to lose a bit of patience and was about to bang on the door again, the front door would sling open hard, and a big black dude stomps out, looking down at you with rage in his eyes! You know this man as the man that helps take care of the women in the trailer!
"The fuck do you want Porky?"
"I-I was just wondering if Tiffany could come out and um, you know, help me make another video so I can have a bit more spending money and..."
"Yeah well, she isn't doing anything right now, so get the fuck off of the porch!"
"Oh come on, look, I'll give you a cut of the money if you let her or someone come out and assist me with a video or two and..."
"And I fucking told you, she is not coming out! Now fuck off before I beat your fat ass with a baseball bat!"
As soon as he slams the door shut, you would start to mutter some words under your breath...
"I FUCKING SWEAR, I'M GOING TO GET OFF OF THIS PORCH, GO TO A GUN STORE, BUY A GUN, COME BACK, AND SHOOT A BULLET INTO YOUR BLACK ASS YOU NO GOOD, MOTHER FUCKING, PIECE OF SHIT, NIG-"
"HEY, I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO FUCKING LEAVE YOU FAT FUCK! NOW GO BEFORE I COME BACK OUT HERE WITH A BASEBALL BAT!!!

You would get so startled that you would fly off the porch and run down the street at top speed! As soon as you walk to a convenience store, you would call in another Uber to drive you back to your house! As soon as you got back home, you would bitch up a storm on social media, complaining about money, the asshole at the trailer park, and once again, having to sacrifice your weekends to watch the fucking brats! Ross, of course, would chip in and say insensitive shit to you again like, "Welcome to Parenthood!" and "This is what adulthood is like, get over it!" Sorry bastard, IF YOU WEREN'T SO SICK WITH COVID STILL, YOU WOULD BE ABLE TO GO OVER TO HIS PLACE AND KICK HIS FUCKING ASS!!!

You were down a can or two of the "White Claw" beer before going to bed crying your eyeballs out!

On Friday, September 12th, 2025, you would get some terrible news! Your nephew and his friends would be leaving the fair while highly intoxicated! The driver, who was completely blitzed, would start up the car and quickly lose control of it in the parking lot, running over a couple of people in the process! As soon as cops surround her vehicle, your nephew, trying to be her knight in shining armor, would get out and tries to act tough with the cops, but would get dog-piled on and taken into custody quite fast!


Not only that, but your mother has gotten word of your financial troubles and would drive over to Ross's house to try to persuade that bastard to fork over some money to help you out! The greedy bastard refuses and closes up his door, saying he has financial troubles too...lying bastard! Your mother would also sense he is lying and would drive her vehicle into the road and blocks all traffic on the road Ross is living on! Some neighbors will tell her to move, but she would only move if Ross forked over $500 for you! Eventually, the snooty neighbors get fed up and call the police on your mother!
When the police arrive, your mother would lie through her teeth and say she is pregnant, which is far from the truth!!!


This is such horseshit! You start to make plans to confront the bastard tomorrow while hoping that you find a way to slip out of the house and away from the little shits before your wife finds out and kick his sorry fucking ass!

The next morning, on Saturday, September 13th, 2025, you would be woken up with a startle as your wife announces her arrival with the little shits! You let out a deep sigh, knowing that her announcement means that the chains of slavery are put on and you have to watch the fucking brats until Sunday! You would go downstairs in a mopey manner and ask if you could slip by the theater later that evening to kick Ross's ass, but she tells you no, to get over it, and she is going to leave the house for a bit to pick up lunch from McDonald's for you and the kids! An hour or two would pass and your wife has still not come back! Another hour later, and you would get a phone call from the jailhouse! You would pick it up and, once again, it's your wife crying her eyeballs out! Apparently, she got arrested at McDonald's again, just because the manager at McDonald's was being a fucking Karen!!!


Well that is just fucking great! Not only are you stuck with the kids for sure this weekend, but now you may end up watching them until at least fucking Monday! You would down some more "White Claw" beer as you turn on your Apple TV account to pick out a movie!


After you turn it on, you would pick out the "Weapons" movie that came out about a month ago!


As you watch the movie, you started to feel pissed off again, remembering that Ross watched this shit when it first came out and was on an IMAX screen! You would cuss up another storm before downing another can or two of the "White Claw" beer.