Seven Degrees Left of Center

What Was I Thinking?

I am reading through my manuscript today, and I keep asking myself one question. What was I thinking? Some sentences feel stronger than I remember. Others feel like they were written by a tired raccoon with a keyboard. I flip pages and find surprises that make me laugh, cringe, or reach for more coffee.

This is the strange joy of reviewing a draft. I meet the past version of myself, the one who wrote late at night and trusted I would understand the note that says “fix this later.” Now I stare at it and wonder what “this” was supposed to be. I thought I would remember. I did not.

Still, there is something comforting in this chaos. I can see how far the story has come. I can also see where it needs help. That is the real purpose of reading a manuscript with honest eyes. Every rough sentence is a chance to improve. Every confusing moment is a signpost pointing to the next edit.

So I keep going. I shake my head. I laugh at my own choices. I fix what needs fixing. I remind myself that no writer thinks clearly during a first draft. We just write and hope our future selves will sort it out.

And here I am, sorting it out with coffee in hand and a sense of humor. It is messy, but it means the story is growing.

“What was I thinking?” is not a failure. It is the beginning of the rewrite.