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My thoughts released; a mind set free |
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These pages contain my thoughts, from meandering ideas and persuasions to deep cerebrations and serious mentations. Why, for what purpose? To release my mind and set creativity free. Somewhere inside the constraints of my mind dwells a writer, a poet, an artist who paints with words. In here I release those constraints and set the artist free. Perhaps, lost somewhere in the depths of thought, is a story or a poem, waiting to be written. |
| A short entry tonight, our internet is out. Luckily, I can tether to my phone, but unfortunately, I'm not getting a very good signal tonight and it's slower than a sloth. I'm not sure how long the internet will be down. One of my neighbors informed me that a car ran into the distribution building about a mile down the road. He was returning from shopping when he saw the accident. A car lost control, skidded across the road into the building, traveling at highway speed. He said the building is about leveled with the car still in it. |
| It was another beautiful day, but a bit windy. My wife had the day off, so we spent some time joyriding around a couple of nearby lakes, took the dogs out to an open grassy area to run and frolic, and then did a little shopping. After we enjoyed a wonderful dinner, our Easter dinner since my wife worked Easter. After dinner, we sat out on the patio for a while; it's the best time of year for sitting out, it's warm, but not too hot, the air is fresh and clean, and there are no insects to annoy. Last night, we had our first thunderstorm of the season move through. We were forecast to get a little rain, but there was nothing about storms. I woke up about halfway through the night to use the bathroom, and in my half-asleep state, I thought the light was flickering until I heard the thunder roll. I returned to bed and let the rolling thunder and lightning flashes serenade me back to sleep. |
| It was in the upper sixties here today, sunny, and barely a breeze. After my wife left for work, I took the dogs out to enjoy the day and did a little more yard work. Max loves to dig, especially if he's chasing a ground squirrel, so we have a few Husky-sized holes in the yard, even though he and Bellah have a designated digging area. I shoveled some dirt into the wheelbarrow and went around filling in holes. Max, of course, assisted me. Each shovel full of dirt I dumped, he had to sniff, paw, and make sure it was in the hole right. Bellah wanted to play and kept bringing her tennis ball to me, but when I didn't stop to play, she figured out a fun trick. She'd drop the ball in the hole I was filling, so I'd have to pick it up and toss it for her. What should have been a ten or fifteen-minute job took thirty minutes. But I got it finished and sat on the patio with a cup of coffee. The next thing I see is Max digging the dirt out of one of the holes. Before I could stop him, he had a stick that I must have buried. After I refilled the hole, I took the push mower out, checked the oil, and filled it with gas and mowed the back yard. The grass is just turning green so it didn't need to be mowed yet, but the thick blanket of leaves from last fall needed mulching. I had a tracker on to see how many steps/miles I took pushing the mower around the yard; almost two miles, or 4576 steps; and that wasn't the entire back yard since there were few leaves up by the house. After I had another cup of coffee, then in to make dinner. I don't mind cooking, but when I'm cooking for just myself, I don't have the motivation to make anything. So my dinner tonight was a poached egg, hashbrowns patty, and a butter/white sauce. Now, I'm off to find something to review to complete my daily five and see what all the talk in the Newsfeed about today's animation is all about. |
| I was outside with the dogs a bit ago and saw a big rabbit moving around behind the garage. Then, the dogs saw it and pursued to give chase. Luckily, there's a lot of brush and a fence for the little critters to escape. I scolded them for chasing the rabbit, then explained, "It's fine to harass the squirrels pilfering the bird feeders, but you should leave the other critters alone." They sat attentively, cocking their heads while I talked. Then Max said something, but I didn't understand him. "What did you say? Are you telling me why it was so important to chase the rabbit?" I would have sworn he said yes. "Okay, explain to me why you think it was acceptable to chase that rabbit." Max stood up and let out a pretty impressive dialogue, unfortunately, I don't speak Husky. He has taught me a few important words like out, water, Mom's home, and when something bad has happened, I'll ask, "Who did this?" To which he answers, "Raul." (Raul is his imaginary friend, I think.) Today, I believe he was explaining to me that the cheating rabbit had not left any Easter eggs, no toys, no treats, no basket; Nothing except a trail of Cocoa Puffs. |
| Yesterday was chilly, windy, gray, and wintery. Today the sun is shining, there's a gentle breeze, and it's in the fifties. Being nice out, and almost done with my daily five (I still have a review to do) I think I'll spend some time outside. Max and Bellah will enjoy getting to romp and play while I find something that needs doing. Yesterday I enjoyed eating solid foods, but after I had digestive discomfort despite sticking to a bland diet. Today I had chicken, potatoes, and carrots (much better than yesterday's menu), and my digestive track is handling it fine. It's a great day, I feel much better now that I'm taking in more than six hundred calories a day (it's hard to make requirements on a liquid diet), I have energy, and the sunshine rejuvenates my soul. Also, a tip mentioned in a previous blog by Wordsmitty has aided a lot. I'll be back later to do a review, catch up, and explore what's happening around the site. |
| The weather is being very rude! Yesterday was in the sixties, but dropped into the fifties when the rain moved in. Today was supposed to be in the sixties again, and sunny, but instead we barely made it into the forties, and it was cloudy and windy. I need to keep three sets of clothing on hand this time of year; winter clothes, spring clothes, and summer clothes. I'm still able to eat, which is great, but after four days of only liquids, it's taking my stomach some time to get used to having food in it. Yesterday I made a pot of homemade beef and barley soup for dinner and enjoyed it. After, however, I had to contend with my digestion restarting. Today it's going better, I had toast with jam for breakfast, a cup of yesterday's soup for lunch, and for dinner another cup of soup with a grilled cheese sandwich. It's like "The Good, The Bad, And the Ugly"; it's good to be eating again, it's bad that it causes some stomach distress, and it's ugly that shortly after eating, I'm running for the bathroom. But, today was a lot better than yesterday, and tomorrow will be better yet. Of course, I should add that some nicer weather would help out a lot as well. I put on ten pounds over the winter, but with the eating problems I have taken them back off, so there's always a bright side. |
| It happens every time. Maybe I shouldn't say it happens every time, but most times. I've been having some medical issues since Saturday evening with what seems to be a hiatal hernia. It's been painful trying to swallow thin liquids, and anything more refuses to enter the stomach, which means it has to come back out. I had a couple of scrambled eggs for brunch on Saturday before going to the State park for the afternoon with my wife and the dogs. We hiked just over two miles, stopping here and there to enjoy the day, let the dogs play, or swim. After, we stopped for a few groceries and then went home to make supper. We started eating around seven. I had half of a hashbrowns patty, a few bites of corn, and a bite of my pork chop. We also had some beets, and when I took a bite, they didn't go down, and nothing has since. Not until last evening, the night before I was scheduled to see the doctor. Last night I was starving. Not just hungry, I was starving after forty-eight hours of nothing but liquid. I decided to try a scrambled egg, cooked soft and mashed, so I mixed one egg with a little milk and scrambled it in just a bit of butter. Once done, I tried a bite and guess what? It wouldn't go down. It hadn't come up, but was just kind of stuck at the bottom of my esophagus, so I took a small drink of milk, hoping to wash it down. It didn't work, so I took another swallow and prepared to run for the bathroom, figuring everything would reverse directions. Instead, I felt a very sharp pain around the top of my stomach, and everything pushed through. I tried a second bite, then a third, taking small bites and washing each down with a little milk—I was eating again. It only seemed right, after four days of suffering and starving, that the night before I saw the doctor, the problem would end. But, my lower esophagus is still of sore, and I don't want this to flare back up, so I did see the doctor, who gave me a referral to see a surgeon to have a consultation, so I can find out if they are going to do an upper endoscopy, or if I have to drink radioactive chalk juice, swallow a barium tablet, and have it x-rayed. Then, depending on what the cause of the problem is, I can schedule a procedure to correct it. Or, I could say, I see the surgeon at the end of the month. Depending on the test he wants to do, it will likely be a few weeks, then if I have to go in for surgery, another few weeks; I could just say that I will be able to get this fixed in six to eight weeks. I won't bet on it, but I'm pretty sure that when I go in to see the surgeon, everything will be back to normal. If the past reflects the future, they may not find anything, it happens most every time. Note: I just had a serving of saltine crackers washed down with Ensure; it sure feels good to eat again. |
| It seems I have a hiatal hernia or something similar. It's been a minor problem up until last Saturday when it flared up. I ate about half my dinner, then it struck; I couldn't get the food to go down. Since then, I've tried eating different things that should be easy to swallow, but no luck with anything other than liquids. I take a bite, I chew it until there's nothing to get stuck, but it doesn't enter the stomach, and after a period of discomfort, it's forced back up. So, it's been oatmeal water, Ensure, some milk, etc.... So, as you can guess, I'm extremely hungry. With my hunger constantly gnawing at me; everywhere I look, all these yummy-looking foods are advertised. Tomorrow I get to see a doctor, and hopefully can get something to help out. I'm sure it will require an endoscopy, which will have to be scheduled, meaning more waiting, but I'm hoping there's something that can be done sooner so I can at least eat again. It's not that I don't have some reserves to burn off; it's just that I enjoy good food, and now everywhere I look, there are pictures of food, or someone talking about food. It's torture. In the meantime, I'm trying to find more sources of nutrition I can drink. |
| I can waste time, as can most people, but some make an art out of wasting time. I first realized this as a child; one of my older brothers was nicknamed "Flash" because he could be so slow. One example was a Saturday fishing trip we had planned out. He wanted to get up early and be fishing by six in the morning. He was not an early riser, unless you consider early riser to mean early afternoon. But, I was tasked to get him up at five and have things ready so we could leave shortly after. I was up at four-thirty, had coffee going, and made the last few additions to the trunk of the car, as most of the gear was loaded the evening before. I enjoyed a cup of coffee and then went in to wake him. I started fifteen minutes early because I knew he would not get up the first or second time I called him. It took four attempts to get him out of bed. Then he was off to the bathroom, then coffee and some cereal for breakfast. I had filled a thermos with hot coffee, enjoyed a second cup, and was ready to go. He was drinking his first cup and getting sidetracked with other things. By five-thirty, he was sipping a second cup and still not dressed or ready. After another fifteen minutes, he went to get dressed but didn't have any clean socks. I let him wear a pair of mine. By six we were going out the door, but he was cold and had forgotten to pack a jacket; I let him use one of mine. Finally, a little after six, we were on our way, but he needed to stop at a convenience store for a few items to bring with. By six-thirty, we were again on the way and hit the river by seven. I unloaded the car while he investigated the bank, looking for a nice place to fish from. Finally, we had our spot and I baited and cast out my line. His reel was tangled from the last time he had gone fishing, so he was pulling out line and trying to get it untangled. He also didn't have much tackle with him, so again, he used mine. Finally, by eight o'clock, he was fishing. By a quarter past eight he had a fish on, but he had fallen asleep, so I reeled it in and stowed his line after releasing the fish. I also had a fish on and almost lost it because I was taking care of his stuff instead of watching my line. By noon, I was ready to head home, but he was still sleeping. I had caught about a dozen nice sized trout and released them, keeping only a couple for myself, since nobody else cared for trout. I woke him after I had everything loaded and ready to go, around twelve-thirty. He needed some coffee was upset because I had let him sleep. He also dinked around while he drank his coffee, had to wander off to take a leak, almost got lost, and finally found his way back; he somehow came upon the road we had driven in on and walked back to the river. By one-thirty we were heading back home, but he needed to stop at an ATM first. |
| Not sprinter as in race, but sprinter as in the current season between spring and winter. It's cold, windy, and damp out today. We did get a little precipitation during the night, and it feels more like winter than spring. After such a nice weekend, it's kind of a downer to have to put on a jacket to step out, but it will be nice again soon. Being a Monday also didn't help liven the mood today; My wife is back at work today, but only after assisting me with a needed visit to my doctor. However, being Monday, it's still not straightened up. I'm currently waiting for a call back from my primary physician, or more likely, her nurse. There have been some minor issues for a while, but Saturday, it flared up badly. I don't know for sure, but the symptoms match those of a hiatal hernia. So, this morning, a call to the clinic was the plan. But, it's going to take a few weeks to get in and see her. Her nurse, however, returned my call and told me that I should schedule an appointment with a surgeon to have a consultation for an upper endoscopy. The only question I needed to get answered first was if I needed a referral from the doctor for my insurance. Next, I called my insurance to find out. No, they do not need me to get a referral. go ahead and schedule it. But when I tried to schedule a consultation, they wanted a referral from my doctor. So, again I tried to get an appointment, but I can't get in until almost two weeks. My next question was the possibility of seeing a different doctor to get the needed referral. The answer was yes, I can schedule an appointment with another doctor, or go to the walk-in clinic and have it checked, then if it's determined I need an upper endoscopy, they will refer me to my primary doctor to get it set up (or basically to get the referral to the surgeon. Basically, I can't get anything done until I see my primary doctor, who then can refer me to someone who can diagnose and provide me with options. I'm still waiting for a call back to see if my doctor can send a referral so I can get in to see someone. The other option is, if it's urgent, I can go to urgent care and be treated, but likely be told after to set up an appointment with my primary provider. I also have to call the insurance company and have them determine if urgent care is required or I may get stuck with the bill. Does anyone know a good vet? |
| Yesterday was a busy day, and I didn't have much time here. Today, I was planning on catching up, but instead, I had another busy day. Yesterday was a fun day; today, I worked more in the yard and spent time outside while it remained nice. We had near seventy degrees Fahrenheit this weekend, but rain and possibly snow are moving in tonight. I doubt we will see any on the ground, it should melt as fast as it hits, but we will have cooler days for a while. At least, that's what the folks in Grand Forks are predicting. I also started my spring diet, after putting on ten pounds over the winter. It isn't the diet I was planning on, however. Yesterday for dinner, we had beets. I know, a lot of people don't care for them, but I like them. Unfortunately, I'm not sure they like me. Or at least it seems that's the cause of my current problem. While eating some of the beets, I found I couldn't swallow them. They went down, but got stuck in my esophagus. I won't gross you out with the rest of the details. Today, I am still having trouble eating or drinking, as if my esophagus is restricted above the stomach. So, it's nothing but liquids for a while. It could also be a hiatal hernia, or even some other condition, I'll let the medical professionals figure it out; I'm making an appointment tomorrow. Of course, this means there is a high probability that the problem will correct itself in the next few days, depending on how quickly I can get in to see the doctor. That's the way these things tend to go, it seems. |
| A beautiful spring day, despite it being a bit gray and drab for most of it. The temperature was in the sixties with a slight breeze, and it tried to rain a few times, but all we felt was a drop here and there. My wife is off the weekend, so we enjoyed a leisurely morning, then after lunch, drove over to Maplewood State Park. The park had something going on when we arrived: a lot of cars, some people grilling, and people wandering along, a regular shindig! We went by and pulled of on the side road that goes back into Lake Lyda and the non-electrical campsites. It's a bout a mile walk in and out, but today the dogs decided they wanted to get in the lake. It wasn't the best area for them, so we hiked over to the public landing and let them play in the water for a bit. They were pretty dry by the time we returned to the vehicle, and we were pretty tuckered. It was just a tad over 2.5 miles round trip, not that far, and on a gravel road, but the hills did us in. We definitely need to get back in shape before we hike the trails. |
| It's sixty degrees today, sunny, and the ice on the lakes is vanishing quickly. I'm starting to feel eager to take the kayaks out of storage and get them in the water. Tomorrow we are planning a trip over to Maplewood State Park to see how open the lakes are, do some hiking, and enjoy a day of fresh air and sunshine. Part of me insists it's too early in the year to kayak. But is it? My wife and I purchased our first kayaks in late autumn, after the prices dropped. Despite the cooler weather, we were eager to take them out. and enjoyed them into November when the ice along the shore made it too difficult to launch them. People may have thought we were crazy out kayaking in a snowstorm, but we didn't mind. I suppose I'll contemplate the idea for a while yet, I'd like the air temperature to be a bit warmer just in case either of us ends up in the water. But, if we stay close to the shore and in the general area of the vehicle, we could bring dry clothes and ensure a means of warming up if needed. I recently answered a question about the last time I went outside my comfort zone; maybe it's time to step outside it again. A proud member of "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"  "Reading soothes the soul, writing sets it free." T.J. |
| I was recently asked if there was any particular song that reminded me of the time period when I met my wife. I was divorced at the time and raising three teenagers. I had a girlfriend for a while, but things weren't working out, so we kind of drifted our separate ways. I was also trying to rediscover myself at the time. I had come to this conclusion after a few short romances that didn't work out; "I'd be better off to give up dating and looking for that special someone and focus on myself and the children." I was doing just that when I met the mother of a couple of my daughter's friends (sisters). She had come to provide the sisters a ride home, we met and soon we were friends. We had both come to realize that we were better off single and without being in a relationship. But, in my heart, I still longed for someone to share my life with, to share theirs with, and to fill the emptiness inside. We quickly became best friends, and do to circumstances we could not prevent, ended up living in the same house. Love had struck deep and hard without us even realizing it. The song that reminds me of the time frame when love arrived at my door with a simple knock was by the Eagles, it described what I was longing for and what I thought I would never find. |
| It was a beautiful day today despite the warnings for thunderstorms. In fact, it clouded up some, looking like rain for about an hour this afternoon, otherwise clear skies through the day. I wouldn't mind seeing a bit of rain; it would clean up the mess winter left us with, but I also enjoyed the sunshine. I sat out on the patio in a t-shirt enjoying the sun on my skin while the dogs frolicked and played. Of course, the snow is still melting so it's muddy, but even that should be gone within a day or two. One of my neighbors saw me sitting out and came over and visited, also in a t-shirt. It was in the mid-sixties, so not overly warm, but comfortable. Then, Steve pointed to another neighbor out cleaning up his yard. He was in shorts, no shirt, and flip-flops, enjoying the day. I think it's a bit cool for that much bare skin, but he didn't seem to mind. |
| "Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away..." At least when the day started, they seemed far away, but then life hit before my second cup of coffee. I awoke early yesterday, put coffee on then opened the curtains to look out at the sunny morning. It was a beautiful but chilly morning. Even so, the heat of the sun was beginning to melt more of the snow and ice. I poured my first cup of wake-up juice and settled down with my laptop to see what was transpiring here. But, before I could do much, the dogs got up and came to say good morning. Bellah needs some loving right away when she gets up, and Max has to sit on my lap for a few minutes, so I closed my laptop and directed my attention to them. Next, they need to be let out to do their morning business, so I went to get dressed. It was much to cold out for my pajama shorts and sleeveless t-shirt. I took my coffee and went out to watch them sniff and inspect the yard, get distracted by the birds and squirrels, and to remind them why we went out. Finally they took care of business and we returned in, just in time for me to refill my coffee. By now, my wife was up so we sat down to discuss what we would do for the day. Before we could and after only a sip or two of my second cup of coffee, my wife's cousin showed up at the door. He drives truck, so he has packages delivered here for safe keeping until he can stop by and pick them up. Yesterday, however, he also needed to take his private vehicle in for some work, and needed someone to follow him over and give him a ride back. Of course, he doesn't take it some place close, so by the tie we got back it was lunch time. After lunch he got a text stating his vehicle was fixed and ready to pick up, so again he needed a ride. This took until late afternoon since the vehicle wasn't quite ready when the text was sent. When I got back, my wife informed me that we needed to pick up a few things from the coop store, which closes at five. We had a half hour to get there and pick up our items. One of them was salt for the water softener, which was getting very low. We also had some grocery shopping to do, so it was around dinner time when we returned home. I helped unload the pickup and took the salt in to fill the tank. That's when I discovered that we had a small water leak going into the softener! Luckily, it was just a rubber gasket, and I had one on hand, but it meant shutting the water off to repair. Of course, it's plumbing, so nothing cooperated, and by the time I finished, with my wife's help, it was after eight. It looked like a late dinner, and unfortunately, we had planned for stir-fried beef and vegetables. I say unfortunately because it's a time-consuming meal to fix using all fresh produce. But, my wife and I jumped in and tag-teamed the task, and by nine thirty we were enjoying a delicious, but late dinner. After, I assisted with cleaning up and dishes with the plan of logging in after we finished. But, and there seemed to be too many buts yesterday, my wife's cousin showed up as we were doing the dishes. He had been called from work to take a load out but his vehicle was acting up. His request, "Can I park my pickup here and get a ride over to work?" It wasn't a problem except for the time it would take; He's supposed to have someone from the shop come get his vehicle, fix it right this time, and return it to his place of work for him when he gets back. But for me, it meant that I would be late getting back home, which I did around eleven-thirty. I hustled to get logged in to complete my five, but wouldn't you know it, the internet was down. I wound up tethering my laptop to my phone, which wouldn't be a problem except I haven't used my hotspot since last summer and couldn't remember the password! After a few attempts I did get connected and logged in with about ten minutes left to get my five done which I was doubtful of. But I rushed, I typed fast (probably with many typos) and finished with two minutes left. |
| I don't have much time tonight, minutes left to complete my five. Let's just say it was unplanned and busy. I doubt I'll make all five but I'm trying. |
| It was another nice day today, in the fifties and sunny with a light breeze. I decided to try and find the sidewalk that runs between the house and the garage. Both roofs slope towards it, and the house shades it, so the snow doesn't melt as fast, and all the runoff from the house and garage creates a lot of ice. I shoveled what snow I could; it was packed, wet, and heavy, but I eventually uncovered the ice underneath. I put some salt down and relaxed on the patio while it did its magic. I had filled the bird feeders yesterday but the birds and squirrels had them pretty well empty, so I refilled them and watched various birds flock to the feeders. After a cup of coffee I returned to my task of chipping the ice away from the sidewalk and busted most of it loose, shoveled it away, and admired the long lost cement walk before calling the dogs in and taking a much deserved break. Shortly after coming in, I heard Bellah growling at something and went to investigate. I figured it would be the squirrels harassing the feeders, but instead discovered a couple of wild turkeys cleaning up the spilled feed from the ground. The birds were working as a team, the smaller ones landing on the feeder and knocking feed down for the turkeys. I poured another cup of coffee and returned to the window to watch, and discovered a deer had arrived. She would stand on her back feet, tip the feeder dumping seed on the ground. Then she and the turkeys would eat until it was time to dump some more. Soon the squirrels showed up to join the feast, as well as a couple of rabbits. I was reminded of a song a I watched the gathering of birds and critters: |
| The sun is hot today even though the temperature is just a little above thawing. Our recent snow is melting fast creating numerous rivulets as the melt-off flows down the slope of our yard. I found myself traversing back in time to my youth, playing and laughing as my best friend and I would find sticks, carve them into boat shapes, and sail them down the flowing water. Once bored with sailing, we would take wet snow, sand, and mud and create damns across the rivulets, watching as the water pooled and grew deeper until it would burst through and flood the lands below. We would use snow, sticks, and even small rocks to create a town below the damn, then watch as the flood waters would obliterate our creations. Kelly and I would be soaked and muddy by the time her mom or mine would announce it's time to come in. We would both get in trouble, although never serious, but enough to make us stay in for the rest of the day. But there was always tomorrow and we would do it all over again. Kelly and her family moved when I was about eleven or twelve, but our paths crossed a few time after I finished school. When I joined the service we lost touch but years later met online. I wrote a poem for her after we reunited online: "Come Out and Play" |
| Has spring finally arrived? The season has, even if the weather hasn't. Despite the recent, heavy, and deep snow, the frost seems to be out of the ground and it's melting from the bottom up as well as the top down. There are already numerous places in the yard where the ground is showing. I spent some time outside today and noticed the trees are budding and some of the little animals are out and about. In the strip of trees along side our property I saw a groundhog out and about (pretty brave with our two dogs) searching for food. I also noticed a lone robin perched in the big oak, watching me. I suppose it was hoping I was out to fill the feeders. I didn't disappoint it, I loaded up the feeders as well as scattering feed on the ground. I also, scattered some meal worms in the bare spots and watched as it flew down and feasted. I did a bit of straightening up in the garage, and when I came back out, I found the lone robin was no longer alone. A whole flock, twenty or more, had moved in to feast on the seeds and meal worms. I went in, got a cup of coffee and sat out while I watched the enjoy the feast when I noticed a couple more visitors looking for food, a pair of orioles hanging around where my wife hangs their feeder. I didn't have any oranges for them, but they seemed to enjoy the dried blueberries and a few strawberries I tossed their way. |
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