Yesterday was my birthday. I can't believe I'm really this old. I guess we stay young in our hearts forever. Only the mirror and the calendar tell us differently. And the way our joints creak. To cap it off, the electricity was off over six hours. I was expecting my niece and her extended family to come by my house since they were in town. But without air-conditioning, they opted for the local park and picked up pizza and doughnuts. So we sat on damp park benches and only two kids cried (one 7 years old, and one 9). But it was cool after the rain, and we watched ground hogs and birds. I went home, lit a candle before it got dark and sat with a flashlight in my lap. I did not want to run the phone down, so I had nothing to listen to or watch. Thank goodness I had a small battery-operated fan to set on the table beside me. I always have internal dialog, so it gave me time to think. It was too dark to write. I tried to use a flashlight to read my Kindle, but that was boring and tedious. Just as I was going to bed (I brushed my teeth by candlelight), the power came on. What timing! Now I am officially a whole year older. I still don't like to say the number out loud! |
When I started the rehab program, it was scary. I thought it was too soon after surgery. But I soon learned that I was safe. The staff wasn't going to push me past what I was able. I felt self-conscious about my lack of speed and my ordinary clothes. It looked like a gym, and some of the patients looked like athletes. Now I am approaching the end of my program and it feels like it has flown by. I know I am stronger and have more endurance. I'm faster according to the tests. There is still so much to accomplish. But I've taken the baby steps. When I'm done, I'll take some more baby steps. On the nutrition side of things, I've learned that fast food places are the devil's playground. I can't walk down the frozen food aisle in the store because that's where the highly processed foods are. I have always preferred fresh produce to frozen, so that will continue. I just have to do more greens more often. I will miss my pot pies and the occasional prepared meal. I've swapped some old bad habits for some new bad habits. A loaf of bread would stay in my house until it was stale or moldy. Now I am only buying sourdough or whole grain bread, and I like them too much. I've also discovered natural peanut butter, no sugar or salt or oils added. You have to refrigerate it once you stir it up. So now I consume too much of that in place of cookies and potatoes, etc. You can't accomplish it all in a short time. Baby steps. Just baby steps. If I want better quality of what remains of my life, I need those baby steps. |
Like housework, yard work is never done. If you pull up the weeds by the roots, they will grow back. No matter how you cut the grass, you will need to do it again soon, like cutting your hair. It always comes back. Yard work can become an obsession. Once I get started, I want to keep going, until I'm cut up and bleeding (I'm on blood thinner and like a lot of older people, have thin skin) or have too many bug bites. Then there's days like today, when I just can't make myself go out there and do anything. I have a fried, 80 years old, who loves pulling weeds. Her vision of Heaven has a little plot of weeds that she can weed every day. She talks to herself and to God while she's on her knees. She lives in a very classy, upscale neighborhood, and likes to brag that she's the last person in there doing her own yard work. Believe me, if I had the money, I would have someone else prune my hedges, cut the grass, cut down all the unwanted vines and ivy. and haul away the brush. As for housework, I've decided I can live with dust. As long as the laundry is done, the bed is made and the toilet and sinks are clean, I'm okay. I will never be labeled a good housekeeper. But that outdoor stuff weighs on my mind. I dream of getting my patio redone (weeds between stones) and having some trees trimmed or removed. I shopped for tools today, but didn't get any. I'm on a budget. I will have to get by with what I can. |
People who think the Bible is boring haven't taken a good look at it. Especially the Old Testament. It's a case study for psychologists and family counselors. It is full of lying, deceit, treachery, adultery, incest, violence, power struggles. There's even a ghost or two and conjuring. We can take a look at father Abraham. His great nephew, Laban, deceives Jacob, Abraham's grandson, and gets 14 years of free labor out of him to increase his own vast holdings. Jacob's mother, is also his first cousin once removed, and Abraham's great niece and sister to Laban, deceives Isaac, Abraham's son, in his old age to get the birthright for her favorite son over the first born. There's a lot of dishonest and deception in that family. It even carries into the next generation when ten of Jacob's sons lie and pretend that Joseph is dead and sell Joseph to a foreign caravan as a slave. Then there's that whole Sodom and Gomorrah thing with his nephew Lot, son a another brother of Abraham. Lot was a grown man with children who were at least teenagers before Abraham had any children. Women were not highly valued as we see when Lot offers his own daughters to the mob to protect his visitors (angels), David, the first king of Israel, is a case all by himself of how to be a bad parent. All of his kids are messed up, at least until he gets to Solomon. David is guilty of so many things, including arranging the murder of a man. He wrote beautiful poetry and sang songs to God and danced. He was physically fit and inspired many, a man after God's own heart. But to him, women were not real people, but brief interludes, to be used and tossed aside. He had to fear his own son. It starts with Adam and Eve, who played their own mind games in the Garden. Their children live in our minds forever as not displaying brotherly love. There are so many more, and I am not a Biblical scholar, but I can read and know there are juicy things there for everyone to read. You might conclude that God loves us and can use us even in our most awful condition. He doesn't ask that His people be perfect, which a lot of people fail to understand. History shows us that mankind has continued to practice one thing while believing something else. After all, they're only human. |
Something I haven't thought about in over 40 years is universal service. Not every young person is military material, but that shouldn't excuse them from serving the homeland. That would include new citizens which wasn't that big an issue back in my hippie days. Females and males could serve for two years in a suitable and desirable capacity. National parks and forests, environmental issues, medical triage and health agencies could all benefit from a two year service stint. They could leave the service with job skills, and a sense of stability. That service could be delayed for college or other schooling. High school could end a year sooner, but that's another topic. I've talked to medics who said they learned their jobs under fire. In fact, a lot of medical technicians don't have the schooling, except for a class or two if sponsored by a medical office. The non-military jobs could have weekends off to plan a career after the service. These young people would have two years to feel pride in serving their country while learning a job skill in administration or in the field or clinic. This might eliminate or at least reduce joining gangs, homelessness, or going on welfare. You could still have a "boot camp" for all the outdoor jobs. Going on to college or the military could be an option. Service could shorten the waiting time for citizenship as it does already for the military. By the time some politicians wrote this out, it would be 110 pages single spaced and leave loop holes. The way I envision it, everyone, including the handicapped would have a place of service. No exemptions, equal tool and opportunities. |
My family is scattered. We no longer get together on every little occasion. I guess it makes the event more enjoyable when we do get together. So I'm not planning on any cookouts or picnics. I plan to make some healthy minestrone soup. But I'm sure I will find some unhealthy things, too. I just don't have enough will power to be good all day. I have successfully dropped table salt. I will have watermelon with or without company. We have a park locally with a corner dedicated to the Vietnam lost. I may go there Monday and take a walk after a brief contemplation in the reserved area. I need to get my steps in when I'm not in rehab. I'm sure TV will have lots of war movies, including Audie Murphy films. If it's not raining I have outdoor work to do. I am grateful to the men and women who have given their lives in defense of our country. They did their duty as they saw fit and paid a big price for it. I hope that we will see an end to war and the need for people to die in the service of their country, except of old age. |
I noticed a lot of dead branches on my large butterfly bush, which really does draw butterflies when it blooms. So I trimmed it a little. I raked up a big pile of brush. But I realized as I got in the car this morning it still has dead spots, and not just the big branches near the bottom. I'm waiting for my brother to come with his chain saw to get those thicker lower branches. So this afternoon, I took my clippers to it again. I started trying to shape it, but had second thoughts. After pulling out the parasitic vine the other day and clipping more dead pieces, I think shaping is the least of my worries. I will let it dangle naturally whichever way it likes until it blooms. Hopefully, it will fill out some more. I raked up enough rush to double the pile I started with. You can see through the bush now. Who knew that the greenery in it was really just the vine choking it out. The leaves are very different, so I know I pulled out the right thing. It should be easier to get down on the ground and dig up the ivy and creeping charley without the sticky dead pieces poking me in the face. I was covered with pieces of dead twigs and had to vacuum myself when I went in. It takes a lot of work to maintain a yard. If I ever go to a new place, I will remember that and limit my planting. |
Our very able pianist went to a conference today and couldn't get back in time. So we all got text messages that we could cancel tonight, and the director will either do a solo or find someone who would. We have a very small choir. Those of us who still attend do not have outstanding voices and are aware of that. However, we blend together fairly well. No show-offs are in our group. The director is very patient and tolerant and tries to select numbers we either have done when we were more than twice as many or is just plain simple sight reading. We are self-conscious of the meekness of our sound. The piano we are now using in the sanctuary is on loan from an elderly member now in a home. Her granddaughter will get it next year. It's a beautiful old grand piano with excellent sound. Even with the top down, it is extremely loud and drowns out the choir, which is fine with us. The audience has complained that they can't hear the voices. A few weeks ago, we did a very simple song in 4 part harmony a capella. We were surprised at the compliments and cheers. They liked the harmonies. I listened to the tape, and it was subtle, but on key and all together. We proved we didn't need the piano to carry us (sometimes we really do). I miss choir when we don't meet. It's not just the singing, the discipline of following the musical rules and the leader, but the fellowship. Some weeks it's only five of us, plus the accompanist and director. and some of us are aging and losing our singing voices. But we keep trying and trying to recruit. |
This one was not unexpected. She was only 2 weeks short of her 101st birthday. She was full of energy. She would not allow her son-in-law to cut her grass until she was 99 1/2. She attended hymn sings (we call them that, but they include She'll Be Coming Round the Mountain, My Bonnie, and songs we all sang as kids) when we went to senior homes. She was older than some of the people to whom we sang. I have known this woman since I was a toddler, too many decades to admit. She was the mother of a good friend who was my college roommate one year. In recent years, since moving back to my hometown after my divorce, we were in the same Sunday Bible class. I moved to a first name basis when we worked on so many things as equals. She was well respected and well remembered. We should all be remembered and respected so much when it's our time to go. Of course, that means being a good person now and doing good things for others. I am a generation behind her, and I do not have the energy that she had when she was my age. It makes me sad to see so many of my friends and family passing on. It also inspires me to walk in their steps and live life to the fullest while I have a chance. |
I saw a comment on a Newsfeed that only humans can adapt or change their environment. I don't accept that. In my Forestry class, we learned that plants are adaptable in order to survive. They develop ways to survive animals (deer nibble at lower branches or bears scratch their backs). And anyone who had tried to keep an area of the yard or farm clear, knows that some plants are invasive and choke out desirable plants and trees. The invaders are very hard to clear away. In fact, a whole forest can change and land can recycle itself every fifty to 100 years. I could never figure how to predict that like the professor could. Animals can adapt their behavior to get shelter or food. Block the mice from getting into your storage bins, and they will find some other way rather quickly to get soap, candle wax, cheese or crumbs. In fact, business trainers used mice as an example a few years back for companies to follow in adapting business operations to modern conditions. I would conclude that all living creatures, plant or animal, are adaptable and capable of changing their environment. Humans are not alone or different in this way. |