“Oh my god, really? Get him out, I HAVE to meet this little man….” The mother said to Dallas, her words dripping with a unique mix of genuine concern and, if her daughter and you were not mistaken, lust...
“Got it mom, hold still!” Dallas affirmed, grabbing onto your legs and began to unlodge you with a slow, methodical shimmy, trying to wiggle you out from your sweaty, stale prison without causing any extra stress to her mom with some sort of explosive movement.
“Oh, honey you may want to…” Her mother started to say before her ass took over her train of thought with….
PPPPHHHHUUUURRRFFFTTT
A sizzling stink shot that rumbled for a good 13 seconds against your entire body! Filling your body like you were nothing but a deflated balloon looking for air! The gas stinging your eyes and nose as you got a horrid taste of sour cream, chili and cheese derived flatulence mixed with the distinct horror of shit that made for nose ruining combination.
“Oh god mom! That burns!” Dallas coughed, hardly suffering as much as you were but still had a point-blank shot of the nasty ass blast, something that she had gotten used to being raised by her mother, but never enjoyed it by any means...
“Sorry Dall, I had a Mexican pizza dinner last night…” Her mother blushed, embarrassed she farted right on her daughter.
This did not stop Dallas’s efforts luckily, as her method proved effective as you glided across the sweat soaked fabric, squeezing out bit by bit till you were but a neck sticking out of her crack.
“And I...got him!” Dallas yelled as she pulled you out with one last yank, which was met with a defiant...
BBBBBBBRRRFFFFSSSSttt
Beefy exit gas blast of red meats and beans that shot both you on your butts behind her, your lungs burning from the humid hell gas as you looked up, not too dizzy but hardly perfect from that experience.
“Damn mom, your ass caught a tough one! He didn't even pass out from those! Hehe, you might not want to let him go…” Dallas coughed, waving the spicy air and trying to assert some levity in the air to counter the embarrassment she assumed her mother was feeling at the moment...until you both looked up to see her face. It was blushing, yes, but the way her eyes stared at you, looking up and down like you were an exotic art piece, the way her head seemed swirling and mind wandering made it almost crystal clear something else was on her mind. Something that was affirmed for the both of you as the mother jumped forward, bending down to you and letting her large body loom over you before rattling off in rapid succession:
“Are you single!?”
“Do you like older women!?”
Do you like big butts? Like really big butts!?”
“My name is Victoria and what is yours?!”
Oh my god, did she like you? You had dealt with many of huge, gross women before in your colorful life, but one expressing affection like this was...unfounded to say the least. Though the prospect of dating such a humongous gas bag, no matter how pretty she was, was hardly something you’d ever entertain, so you decided to try and let Victoria down gently….
“Um...Well…” you started to say before a strong hand grabbed onto your mouth, your eyes shooting over to see it belonged to Dallas! Shining a toothy smile to you and then her mother.
“Hehe looks like this little studs kinda-tongue tied, mom! Let me try and get his head on straight and you two can start over.” Dallas explained, leading you several feet away to the center of the mall before letting go and looking down at you, her expression serious and eyes as sharp as steel...
“Look, dude, I know my mom is...unique in a lot of ways but she NEEDS this. She hasn't had a steady relationship since my dad left her and she hasn’t even tried dating for like a decade!” She began, her eyes pleading for you to understand before she shifted back to her serious look.
“To make it even worse, ever since I got to college she drags me along on weekends so she can have some kind of relationship! I love her but I hardly even feel independent and free if I’m forced to hang out with her just so she doesn’t feel alone! So can you please just go with my mom on a date, just for tonight?” She asked, her expression akin to that of a sad puppy, hypnotic and heart wrenching as she begged you to do as she asked! But the thought of the horrid farts that women ripped on you up her ass kept your expression at a disinterested frown, something she didn’t take to kindly too…
“Okay look, when I say my mom needs this I mean NEED. So I’m going to make it happen, even if I have to have my buddy on the mall security staff use the footage of you being sat on as a case to have you charged for sexual harassment by saying you ‘clearly came in wanting something like this to happen.’ So are you going to play ball or Not? One date is not that much in comparison to criminal charges, right?” She threatened, putting a sharp finger into your stomach as she smiled a wicked grin, proud as you could only nod in defeat. After which she simply lead you back over, Victoria starring down at you with red in her pale cheeks as she wiggled her fatty planet of an ass.
“Okay mom, why don't you try that again...SLOWLY” Dallas assured, putting a hand on her mother's shoulder as she took and deep breath and looked you in the eye.
“Ah alright, my name is Victoria and I honestly would love to go on a date with you, your very cute and the fact you didn’t pass out under me is VERY appealing, so if you have the time I’d love to go and do something…” She declared, rubbing the back of her red hair cutely like a shy teenager declaring her feelings for the first time, if she wasn’t so big and gross, you honestly would have found this a lot more appealing.
“Um no I really don’t honestly so I’m good to do whatever…” you said, looking up at her as her face lite up like a child on Christmas morning! Her teeth brimming and body jiggling in joy!
“Oh yes yes yes!!! I can’t believe I’m dating again at 42 years old! Oh my god, it’s been so long!! Oh, I know the perfect place we can do it too! We…”
We should go to the movies!
Let’s go to the food court! Just as good as any restaurant!/Reader’s Choice