Eggman sat at his monitor, having sent out an alert to all of his Egg Bosses and female mercenaries he employed. One by one they all appeared on his monitor bay. Clove the Pronghorn and her sister Cassia, the ninja lynx Conquering Storm, the pirate queen Abyss the Squid, the sleek Nephthys the Vulture, the maniacal loyalist Thunderbolt the Chinchilla, and the wicked troll witch Wendy Naugus.
He played Tails video for them. "I want all of you to submit videos to the fox's contest," he ordered.
"You've got to be kidding," Storm muttered.
"For the glory of Eggman!" Thunderbolt declared, the others rolling their eyes.
"Are you sure this will even work, my lord?" Nephthys said. "I don't mean to question you, but there is a huge element of chance involved in this."
"I'm aware," Eggman said. "I'm not happy about this at all, but for a chance to get access to this Extra Life tech Tails is developing... It's worth it. If you're chosen, try to get him to take you to his lab and steal the technology. Failing that, save a portion of the 'leftovers' after you digest him." The women all went a little green around the gills. "Yes, yes, its gross, but some of it may be tied into his DNA. If you're that squeamish, grab some of his fur. Or seduce him and get semen."
"And if none of us are chosen?" Nephthys persisted.
"Consider yourselves lucky, as due to the high element of chance in this, you won't be punished for failure," Eggman said, sighing. "I refuse to let this opportunity pass us by. As for your chances... Well, from what little I understand or care about Mobian standards of beauty, I'm reasonably certain all of you save Wendy are reasonably attractive."
Wendy chuckled, misunderstanding what Eggman meant. "Don't feel too offended, girls, when I outclass all of you," the witch said, cackling in her shrill voice.
"Actually," Eggman said, "I want you to have Carrotia make a video offer instead of you."
Abyss, Thunderbolt, and Storm all snickered at the gobsmacked expression on Wendy's face. "B-But... But Eggy..." she stammered.
"One, don't call me that," Eggman snapped. "Two, you're old, you're ugly, and you have a voice like nails on a chalkboard. Have. Carrotia. Make the video."
Offended, Wendy made a mistake. "Now listen here, you-" she started to say.
Eggman hovered his hand over a bright red button, one of twelve. All the Egg Bosses froze in fear. Wendy, sweating visibly, gulped hard. "...I'm sorry, Lord Eggman," she said. "I'll get Carrotia started on the video right away."
Eggman smiled, moving his hand away from the button that would trigger the failsafe in Wendy's cybernetics, and sat back in his chair. "I'm glad we understand each other. Now GET TO WORK." He closed the connection, and sighed. This was a dumb plan, and there was a chance that none of them would get picked. But he had to TRY. "ORBOT! CUBOT! Get me a lemonade! And cookies! The good chocolate ones with the cream filling!" he bellowed.
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