You were really starting to get worried, but decided to just be happy that “Aunt” Barbara worried so much about your well being. Now that she asked, you really had just gone along with it to appease Katherine… But if you were honest with yourself you couldn’t help but have hope it’d really work out and you’d maybe have a new girlfriend (or at least friend) after all of this. “Absolutely. I’ve actually been really looking forward to this.” Barbara’s face was red again for some reason, and she continued to look a bit bewildered and worried… Suddenly, you realized that maybe she had hoped to be consulted with something like this, her having been particularly close to your family and all. “I’m sorry, umm… I hope you’re okay with this too?”
Barbara jumped as you said this, a range of emotions washing over her face… Panic, confusion, trepidation, then… another blush? What was going on with her? Before long, the blush was the deepest you’d ever seen it, and she somehow looked even happier than when you were complimenting her earlier. “Of… of course I’m okay with this! You don’t… you don’t know how happy this makes me!!! I mean, your Mom has been wanting me to get out and date for ages now, and when I finally agreed I was more than a little scared, but… I would have never thought that her and Sarah, let alone Katherine would approve of me dating YOU! No wonder your Mom said my ‘blind’ date already knew who I was, but it’d be a great surprise for me!!!”
Your mind… shut down for reboot. Barbara was here for a blind date too? Was THIS Katherine’s plan? But… even SHE wouldn’t go that far for a joke… your Mom would kill her for hurting her friend… and there was no way your Mom would— okay, maybe your Mom would set you up with Barbara like this, but there was no way Sarah would approve, or lie about YOU approving of this, without at least discussing it with you. And now Barbara thought you wanted this… and actually was okay with it too?! What the hell was going on?!?! Unfortunately, Barbara took your stunned silence as an opportunity to continue talking.
“I… I never knew you were into older women, you know? And, I mean… I HAVE always thought you’ve become very attractive once you became an adult, but… who’d have thought even with all the accidents we had together that you’d still like full-figured gals like me! If I had known that I would have let you snuggle up to this body as much as you wanted the last couple years!! I’m soooo glad your Mom didn’t tell me it was you though! Oh, no, I mean that in a good way! I mean, if I had known it was you I would have NEVER worn something like this… and here I find out this is exactly how you want me all the time! Oh my gosh, I’m breaking out ALL the old outfits from now on!!!”
As Barbara rambled on, neither of you knew what had actually happened. In matter of fact, Katherine had set you up with her friend Sasha for shits and giggles to see how horrible it would go with her klutziness, but Sasha had back out last second, too nervous to see it through. Katherine hadn’t told you because… well she just didn’t feel like dealing with it, and it was a little funny if not cruel to think of you being stood up. Meanwhile, your Mom and Sarah had set up Barbara with who they thought was the perfect guy for her (at least according to his online profile) that could accept her size and at least some of her flaws… even going so far as to reach out for her to ensure he was interested… But this ‘perfect man’ (also a micro, this one much closer to Barbara’s age) hadn’t had the luck you had had at getting Anna the waitress’ attention. In fact, when Barbara had recognized and beelined towards you, she had unknowingly punted the poor guy… right onto the seat of a booth that a chubby college girl immediately got cozy in (and right on top of him), subjecting him to hours of smothering between her butt and the leather booth seat (with only too-small well-worn cotton shorts keeping him from being devoured) while she studied and did homework late into the night. Coincidentally, after surviving hours of this torture and accidentally being stowed away to her apartment where she eventually found him (while blowing up the toilet no less), despite their age gap they ended up in a happy relationship and often laughed about the story of how they ‘met’.
Unaware of this, meanwhile you… were VERY worried. How could this be happening? Even if your family HAD set you up with Barbara, which you highly doubted at this point, the rest of it at least was a HUGE misunderstanding. You actually much preferred women around your age, let alone one that was over double yours. And being around your oblivious mother, ‘mischievous’ sister, and even Barbara herself your whole life had shown you that the larger the ‘assets’, the more dangerous they were to you, both because of the size difference and because they had much more surface area to collect sweat, grime, and who knew what else… You HAD to set the record straight, and as soon as possible before you could no longer untangle this misunderstanding.
“A-actually Aunt Barbara, I—“
“Oh no, if we’re going to be dating going forward, you can’t call me your Aunt! We’ll be closer in a different way now, so… How about Barb? Oh! Or how about you just call me your big ol’ Barbie!”
“Barbie” did her best to entice you, plopping her sweaty breasts onto the table in front of you and surging them forward as she smiled at you in a very decidedly seductive manner… which was slightly hindered by the spattering of boob sweat she splashed onto you. “Okay, umm… B-Barbie—“ You were interrupted once again as she let out a small fit of giggles, apparently very pleased with herself/you calling her by the suggested pet name. “Actually, you need to know—“
“Hello Ma’am, are you ready to order?” You were frustratingly interrupted AGAIN as Anna suddenly reappeared to ask Barbara ((hereafter referred to as Barb or ‘Barbie’, my apologies to Alistair if this isn’t okay)) for her order, before she suddenly realized you were there too. “Oh, hey little guy! So this is who you were meeting? Your… Mom?” Anna did her best at taking a stab at explaining why you’d be meeting someone with such an age difference from you, but your ‘date’ took quite a bit of exception to this mistake.
“Actually I’m his GIRLFRIEND, thank you. He likes a MATURE woman with um— ‘all the right junk in all the right places’! R-right, Honey?”
You were awkwardly thrust into the spotlight as both women looked to you for confirmation of these claims, Anna with a very skeptical quirk of the eyebrow, and Barb with a pleading look, bordering on begging. You realized you could very quickly negate the misunderstanding(s) Barb was under by denying this… and simultaneously embarrass the hell out of Barb and/or shattering her heart to pieces. You… couldn’t do that, at least not in front of Anna like this. All you could hope is that after Anna left you’d have an opportunity to explain yourself without embarrassing or hurting Barb as bad as it would have right now. “Umm, absolutely! Barbar— Barbie is fantastic.”
“Hehe… He calls me his Barbie because he thinks I’m perfect!”
You wanted to protest at this statement, especially since you were only calling her that due to her request, but you had already gone with it this far, so you just plastered on another weak smile. Anna for her part looked from you to Barb with still lingering disbelief, before eventually giving you a look of… disappointment? Or maybe it was just pity… Either way, she did her best to recover from her apparent faux pa. “Ah, well umm… I didn’t mean to intrude on the… love birds? Uh— Tell you what, first drinks are on me, what would you like?”
You just noncommittally tell her a cappuccino, but Barb seems to have much more ambitious plans. “Oh-oh! I’ll haaaave, oh what the heck, I’ll have the ‘S’mores Galores’ Quadruple Shot Super-Size Latte wiiiiith whole milk— could I actually get a little extra milk in there?— And then wiiith extra, EXTRA whip cream, with as much chocolate drizzle as you can on top! Oh, and extra marshmallows of course!”
Anna had a look of amused exasperation for a moment, but then that look turned a little worried as she leaned towards Barb and whispered to her (which did nothing to keep you from hearing it like she intended as everything is pretty loud at your size), “Umm, Ma’am… last time you were in, didn’t you say you couldn’t have much coffee, or ANY dairy, because it kinda umm… ‘goes right through you’? Maybe a nice tea would be better for your date?”
“Oh, don’t worry about that! My little lover boy here loves this dump truck ass so much he doesn’t even mind it smelling like an actual dump. He even comes with me to the bathroom most of the time! It’s soooo great not having to worry about my lactose intolerance scaring him off! Heck, even my IBS doesn’t keep him away from the booty! AND he wants it to just get bigger and bigger! Right, Honey?”
You were struck dumb. How could Barb say such a thing? It was one thing to exaggerate to try and show off, but she had turned her boasting into a full lie that was now embarrassing for YOU. You obviously knew about her lactose intolerance and had in fact been quite worried about her order as well, but here she was telling a stranger that you loved her ass so much that you not only didn’t mind the smell, but went on trips to blow up the bathroom with her? Even if all THAT was true, IBS would have been MORE than enough to scare you away from being around her butt for any period of time. There was no way you could let this go on. You opened your mouth to tell her off…
Choices:
Choice 1 (Reserved by G-Writer): Your stunned silence up to now is used against you…
Choice 2: You deny Barb’s claims, but she claims you’re embarrassed and doubles down on ‘proving’ you like her/her butt.
Choice 3: Anna is surprisingly interested in your apparent ‘kink’, and interrupts you to ask Barb to expand on it.
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