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 Review #4826486 |
 | The Taylors  [GC] Last edited - 2018. Think: Gothic Stepford wives meets Gremlins+eating after midnight.  |
| (5.0)  First Impressions: The idea itself, that everyone has a monster inside, isn’t new, but you weaved a very unique story around the concept. You created a sense of unease right from the start, with details that built a realistic, suburban setting, and gradually let the horror seep through. The readers, of course, didn’t know what exactly the horror was at the beginning. They observed Mr and Mrs Taylor who seemed very real, interacting politely with each other, with perhaps a quiet undercurrent of mutual hatred and love. There was something odd about them, but I would never have guessed what it was. The scene in the bathroom was horrific, and the way you slowly revealed the mother’s actions was very well done. The readers suspected at this point what she was going to do, but that didn’t take away from the horror of witnessing it. Then the tale twisted again, and we got to see just how real those monsters were that you had hinted at throughout the story.  Suggestions: Technically, the story was solid, and I didn’t notice any errors. I do have one comment though, regarding the line Every human being is a monster. It might be personal preference, but I felt like that line is telling the readers what you had already shown them, almost spelling out the message in case they missed it. The rest of the story was written in vivid sensory detail, staying close to the characters and events, but here, you stepped outside to deliver that line as an impartial observer, and it felt a little jarring and flattened a very complex idea. I wouldn’t suggest omitting it, just perhaps frame it differently - maybe have one of the characters show it through their thoughts or actions to make it part of the story.  Final Thoughts: The metaphor of the monsters inside us was powerful, and I liked that you left the question of the characters’ transformation a little vague. It could be an actual transformation into some kind of supernatural being, or this could just be how they see each other in their ugliest moments. It worked well to deliver the message, and the readers could decide for themselves how far they wanted to take the metaphor. This was a strong and memorable story, and I enjoyed the read!
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