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Review #4841864
Viewing a review of:
 Clouds Moving Alone  Open in new Window. [E]
Describing clouds Moving alone
by Quatae Turnage Author Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
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Greetings and welcome to writing.com!

I see here a creative exploration of cloud shapes, seeing them as a child does, with images and attempts to compare them to other familiar forms. The words are gently amusing but ultimately lack a deeper level than the most elementary of meanings. I would suggest drawing a metaphor of the clouds as a fleeting, shifting glimpse of life that changes and dissolves, of wispy illusions that come and go. One might even mention how the clouds hide the sun for a short while but they always evaporate, revealing the bright light of hope at last. This would make it a more memorable and mature poem, bringing the innocence of childhood into the contemplative nature of adulthood and finding unity in the opposition.

I will also recommend using {size:4}{font:Verdana} at the beginning of your items to increase visibility and create a professional appearance across devices. And two more relevant genres are needed to ensure people can find your work when browsing. You can pick Philosophy, Environment, Nature or Children's for this one.

Take care, thanks for sharing and keep writing *Smile* *HeartT*


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