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 Each day feels new, and my memory of the one before is faint. I’m learning to adapt. |
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In September 2019, a seizure revealed a lime-sized meningioma pressed against my hippocampus—the part of the brain that governs memory and language. The doctors said it was benign, but benign didn’t mean harmless. Surgery removed the tumor, and three days later I opened my eyes to a new reality. I could walk, I could talk, but when I looked at my wife, her name was gone. I called her Precious—the only word I could find. A failure of memory, yet perhaps the truest name of all. Recovery has been less cure than re-calibration. Memory gaps are frequent. Conversations vanish. I had to relearn how to write, letter by halting letter. My days are scaffold by alarms, notes, and calendars. When people ask how I am, I don’t list symptoms or struggles. I simply say, “Seven Degrees Left of Center.” It’s not an answer—it’s who I’ve become. |
| One of my recent writing challenges is the feeling of being a fraud. Everything I write reads like something I have read before. Though the thoughts are mine, the words seem ... copied. Even in the books I read, I find similarities in scene descriptions. Is this just a stage in learning how to write? By noticing these similarities, I'm learning more about the craft. This has become frustrating. How to tell my story, my why, yet using the same dictionary of words as everyone else. |
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Sending prayers for continued improvement and recovery 
