I thought you did a great job with the detail and the description in this piece. I'm learning to really appreciate longer form poetry and I think this is a great example of the kind of detail you can successfully include in a piece.

I also like the fact that the poem was broken up into two discrete parts; it helped the narrative and gave the piece an interesting depth to it. Well done!

I don't have any specific suggestions for the content itself, but I am a little curious about the placement of the link to the Bard's Hall contest in your item. Was it put there for stylistic effect? Or because only one part of the two-part poem is an entry for that contest? Some additional context for how that contest relates to your item (since you linked it) would be helpful.

Overall, I think you did a great job with this item. It was well-written, detailed, and kept my interest from beginning to end. The structure was great and the pacing moved along quickly despite being a poem of considerable length. Nice work!

Wow, this was a really powerful (and timely!) story. It was visceral and compelling and troubling in all the right ways. Excellent job!

No suggestions for improvement.

Overall, I'm really impressed by this piece. It was well written and completely compelling. Great work!

I thought the narrative was really compelling and filled with drama for so few words; it kept the story moving at a brisk, unpredictable pace.

I was hoping for a bit more context to the story. Which the pacing was excellent and moved along quickly, I think it came a bit at the expense of fully comprehending the backstory and setup to the story.

Overall, this was an entertaining read. Nice job!

I'm enjoying the ongoing saga of Reema and Dan! Like the other story I read recently featuring these characters, I think the real strength of the piece is their relationship to one another. I also like the mix of different cases/encounters they've had to date.

The action at the end felt a bit melodramatic. Earlier in the story, it's specifically mentioned that Dan has never taken a life in his career, but he wrests control of the gun and starts rapid-fire spraying bullets at people, taking them out, and then quips about it afterward. It felt like there should be more gravitas to this moment where Dan is being pushed further than he's ever been pushed before.

I also thought the idea of the "contract" being prepared where Dan will drop the case felt a little inauthentic. In this type of situation, it's not a really a "parties in good faith agreeing to the terms of a deal on paper" kind of problem, so the idea that a signed contract would be sufficient seemed a little off.

Overall, this was another fun read starring Dan and Reema. Nice job!

I like the way that you extrapolated on the prompt and built an entire narrative off of it. The use of detail and description in the piece made for easy-to-imagine visuals, and it was a compelling situation.

While I'm not sure what the intent of the original contest was, I was personally hoping for a bit more of a story arc. It seems like the protagonist is in the last moments of their life, but there's not much drama or tension to it. I would have loved to see more emotions play out on the part of the protagonist as they realize they are dying or have died.

Overall, this was a solid entry and an entertaining read. Nice work!

This was a fun item. I like the way that you weaved mythology into the story and then built on it to make it distinctly your own. Nice work!

I would have loved in a little more detail and description to build out this fantasy world a little and provide a bit more imagery for the reader to latch onto.

Overall, this was an entertaining read. Good job!