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Printed from https://web1.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/jeff
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4,977 Public Reviews Given
5,106 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I believe in constructive criticism and honesty. I can adapt my review style to fit the kind of feedback an author is looking for (e.g., developmental suggestions, fine-tuning, proofreading, etc.), but will always try to be as encouraging and helpful as possible.
I'm good at...
Plotting, characterization, dialogue, structure/pacing, and professional considerations. I can also do serviceable technical editing/proofreading, but I'm much better with developmental/creative feedback.
Favorite Genres
I read almost everything. I particularly love genre fiction (mystery/thriller and science fiction/fantasy especially) and nonfiction of all kinds.
Public Reviews
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1
1
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Free Folk  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.5)

Hello,

I discovered your item on Writing.com via random Read & Review and would like to offer the following feedback for your consideration.


Positives

I think you did a great job laying out a compelling and heartbreaking situation, and showing how the initial approach and desire for retribution and punishment eventually gave way to a better understanding of both your character's own situation and the situation of the others who have impacted his life. I once heard someone say that carrying around resentment is like drinking poison and hoping it hurts the other person, and you did a good job of capturing this sentiment where worrying about what happens to other people can be an all-consuming and really unhealthy approach to life.


Suggestions

Toward the end of the story when the confrontation with the bullies is brought up, the phrasing of the narrative tended to clump all of them together, implying that all of them had each been to prison, lost a girlfriend, been rejected by society, etc. I would suggest reworking this section to individualize it a little more, explaining how individual negative things happened to individual bullies, rather than grouping them all together in a very specific, very nuanced narrative that feels a little strange to have uniformly happened to every single one of the narrator's antagonists.


Overall

Overall, I thought this was an entertaining read with a great moral lesson and a lot of nuance. Well done!


I hope you've found this review helpful. If so, please consider paying it forward by reviewing the work of another Writing.com author! *Bigsmile*

Sincerely,

Jeff Author IconMail Icon
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2
2
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Free Folk  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
I enjoyed this story. I thought you did a particularly good job of communicating story and character information through dialogue, which helped keep the pace of the story moving along briskly. Overall, this was an entertaining and engaging read. Nice job!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
3
3
Review of Nowhere Dreams  Open in new Window.
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Free Folk  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)

Hello,

I discovered your item on Writing.com via random Read & Review and would like to offer the following feedback for your consideration.


Positives

I really like the message of this piece. I thought the poem was well-constructed, well-written, and evocative. Your imagery was particularly good. Nice work!


Suggestions

No specific suggestions for improvement.


Overall

Overall, I thought you did a great job with this piece. Well done!


I hope you've found this review helpful. If so, please consider paying it forward by reviewing the work of another Writing.com author! *Bigsmile*

Sincerely,

Jeff Author IconMail Icon
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4
4
Review of Thoughts  Open in new Window.
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Free Folk  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)

Hello,

I discovered your item on Writing.com via random Read & Review and would like to offer the following feedback for your consideration.


Positives

I liked the stream-of-consciousness approach to this item, and the meta elements of writing about trying to figure out a writing prompt. It was a well-constructed and well-written item. Nice work!


Suggestions

No specific suggestions for improvement.


Overall

Overall, I thought you did very well with this piece. Great job!


I hope you've found this review helpful. If so, please consider paying it forward by reviewing the work of another Writing.com author! *Bigsmile*

Sincerely,

Jeff Author IconMail Icon
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5
5
Review of Simple Love  Open in new Window.
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Free Folk  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
Hello,

I discovered your item in connection with the Angel Army's "Earn the Badge" challenge, and would like to offer the following feedback for your consideration.


Positives

The simile that opened this poem had great imagery and impact. I also like the repetition in the third stanza which gave the middle part of the poem a good structure. I liked that the lightness and brightness of an emotion like love was reflected in the tone of the piece.


Suggestions

It was a little unclear what the bigger picture intent of the piece was. At the beginning there's a simile that says love is like an adhesive, then the second stanza is about love being something that can't be held in. The fourth stanza has love like an overwhelming, overabundance of something. Given the title is "Simple Love," it felt like the poem was trying to communicate a lot of different, complex thoughts on all the things that love can be.


Overall

Overall, this was a good read and has a lot of potential.

I hope you've found this review helpful.

Sincerely,

Jeff Author IconMail Icon
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6
6
Review of Inner Turmoil  Open in new Window.
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Free Folk  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.5)
Hello,

I discovered your item in connection with the Angel Army's "Earn the Badge" challenge, and would like to offer the following feedback for your consideration.


Positives

This was a really evocative, impactful poem. The resonance of the subject matter, especially with the structure of the last stanza was really powerful.


Suggestions

There were a few points where I think the language could have been finessed a little. For example, in the second line of the second stanza, "Tell my Mom I did my best" might have flowed a little better.

Also, the line about telling his sister not to be upset because "her brother will not rise after this sunset" was a little confusing. All of the other lines seemed to follow logically from one another (i.e., dad won't get tension from him anymore, his brother will get the keys to his bike, etc.), but it's unclear why his sister wouldn't be upset by the idea that her brother has died. It's a little unclear what the intention of that line was.


Overall

Overall, I thought you did a good job with this piece. Nice work!


I hope you've found this review helpful.

Sincerely,

Jeff Author IconMail Icon
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7
7
Review of Rehab  Open in new Window.
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Free Folk  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Hello,

I discovered your item in connection with the Angel Army's "Earn the Badge" challenge, and would like to offer the following feedback for your consideration.


Positives

I thought you did a great job with the emotion in this piece. Your connection to the subject matter is clear, and I enjoyed the flow and the imagery in the poem. I particularly liked the fact that you captured both the good and bad elements of rehab; it led to the feeling that you had a complete, well-rounded perspective on the topic.


Suggestions

There were a few points where the execution was a little rough. At one point you deviated from the aabbcc rhyme scheme to have no rhyme at all ("addicted/hook") and then a point a little later on where you had an imperfect rhyming triplet ("road/erodes/inroads") which broke up the pace and structure of the read a little bit.


Overall

Overall, I enjoyed reading this poem and thought you did a great job capturing your subject matter. There's definitely room for improvement, but you've also got a really strong foundation to build upon. Nice work!


I hope you've found this review helpful.

Sincerely,

Jeff Author IconMail Icon
"Rating & Reviewing Philosophy" Open in new Window.


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8
8
Review of Angel Feathers  Open in new Window.
for entry "Exotic Species" Open in new Window.
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Bradbury Group & Bank  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (3.5)
*Shield1* OFFICIAL JUDGES' REVIEW *Shield1*

Hello,

Thank you for entering the November 2025 round of "The Bradbury Contest" Open in new Window.!


Positives

I enjoyed the premise and the surprising twist at the end. The epistolary form really worked for this type of story and allowed Layla's character voice to shine through. Well done!


Suggestions

The style of the letter felt a little bit at odds with the subject matter. Layla is staying with her brother who's supposedly being detained, but then she moves effortlessly into describing the countryside and other lighthearted details that contrasted against the seriousness of the circumstances.


Overall

Overall, this was an enjoyable read. Nice work!


I hope you've found this review helpful, and thanks again for taking the time to enter this round of the contest!

Sincerely,

Jeff Author IconMail Icon
"Rating & Reviewing Philosophy" Open in new Window.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
9
9
for entry "On the Way Over" Open in new Window.
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Bradbury Group & Bank  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
*Shield1* OFFICIAL JUDGES' REVIEW *Shield1*

Hello,

Thank you for entering the November 2025 round of "The Bradbury Contest" Open in new Window.!


Positives

This story was really imaginative and fun. Your mythology and world-building was really intriguing with a lot of different elements to keep the reader's interest. Nice work!


Suggestions

I'm not entirely sure how the race and the story telling elements of the narrative fit together; it was almost like they were two separate narratives that were compressed together. It would have been great to have a little more context for how these two aspects of the piece are intended to work together.


Overall

Overall, this was an entertaining read. Good job!


I hope you've found this review helpful, and thanks again for taking the time to enter this round of the contest!

Sincerely,

Jeff Author IconMail Icon
"Rating & Reviewing Philosophy" Open in new Window.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
10
10
Review of Spa Day  Open in new Window.
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Bradbury Group & Bank  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
*Shield1* OFFICIAL JUDGES' REVIEW *Shield1*

Hello,

Thank you for entering the November 2025 round of "The Bradbury Contest" Open in new Window.!


Positives

I thought you did a really good job incorporating the prompts into this story. That was a difficult prompt with a lot of moving parts, and you successfully wove them into a narrative effectively given the word count restrictions. The keywords felt both smoothly incorporated and crucial to the story. Well done!


Suggestions

The backstory of Melissa and Audrey killing Whittaker was a little confusing in terms of how they actually carried it out. So much of the backstory's narrative emphasizes that Whittaker is the town's golden boy (a celebrity, basically), and on the night where he's ostensibly at the height of his fame and prominence, he's killed and his body disappeared. I was really hoping for more by way of explanation than "so they buried it all." Just a few key details would go a long way toward helping flesh out this backstory a little.


Overall

Overall, I really enjoyed this story. It was well written, engaging, and a great take on the prompt. Nice work!


I hope you've found this review helpful, and thanks again for taking the time to enter this round of the contest!

Sincerely,

Jeff Author IconMail Icon
"Rating & Reviewing Philosophy" Open in new Window.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
11
11
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Free Folk  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (3.5)

Hello,

I discovered your item on Writing.com via random Read & Review and would like to offer the following feedback for your consideration.


Positives

The visual language in this poem is excellent. The descriptive words chosen were evocative and affecting, and really creates vibrant imagery for the reader. Nice work!


Suggestions

The structure of the poem caught me up a few times, in the use of certain punctuation and line breaks, which disrupted the read a bit. For example, the line "to slay, but cannot, for I am" just felt a little awkward to read given the structure of the phrasing and the commas. There were also a number of line pairings that felt like they broke in the middle of a concept or image, which was a tad bit jarring.


Overall

Overall, I thought you did a good job with this piece. It was a pleasure to read, really entertaining and evocative. Well done!


I hope you've found this review helpful. If so, please consider paying it forward by reviewing the work of another Writing.com author! *Bigsmile*

Sincerely,

Jeff Author IconMail Icon
"Rating & Reviewing Philosophy" Open in new Window.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
12
12
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Free Folk  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (4.0)

Hello,

I discovered your item on Writing.com via random Read & Review and would like to offer the following feedback for your consideration.


Positives

I really liked the imagery and evocative language in this piece. It was well-structured, and was an engaging read from start to finish. Nicely done!


Suggestions

I don't have any specific suggestions for improvement.


Overall
Overall, I thought you did a great job with this piece. Good job!


I hope you've found this review helpful. If so, please consider paying it forward by reviewing the work of another Writing.com author! *Bigsmile*

Sincerely,

Jeff Author IconMail Icon
"Rating & Reviewing Philosophy" Open in new Window.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
13
13
Review of To the Everywhen  Open in new Window.
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Free Folk  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)

Hello,

I discovered your item on Writing.com via random Read & Review and would like to offer the following feedback for your consideration.


Positives

I'm not familiar with this particular form of poetry, but it was great to learn something new and, as far as I can tell, you did a great job of adhering to the form. The imagery was excellent and the flow and structure was quite good. Well done!


Suggestions

No specific suggestions for improvement.


Overall

Overall, this was an enjoyable poem to read. Nice work!

I hope you've found this review helpful. If so, please consider paying it forward by reviewing the work of another Writing.com author! *Bigsmile*

Sincerely,

Jeff Author IconMail Icon
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14
14
Review of Lonely Street  Open in new Window.
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Free Folk  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.5)

Hello,

I discovered your item on Writing.com via random Read & Review and would like to offer the following feedback for your consideration.


Positives

I thought you did a good job with the overall emotional resonance of this piece. The wistfulness and longing for a past era really came through, and you managed to tell a compelling, detailed narrative in only one hundred words (which is not easy to do!). Well done!


Suggestions

I found the second sentence ("No one to converse with about a child's imagination") to stand out a bit from the rest. The other detail elements of the story (i.e., someone commenting on the narrator's own hard work to put up decorations, parents showing off the fruits of their labor, empty candy bowls, etc.) are clearly and inextricably connected to the general concept of Halloween, but I found myself trying to connect with that second sentence.

I'm not sure what Halloween tradition "conversing about a child's imagination" is supposed to directly connect with (talking with other parents about creative costumes? communicating to kids an appreciation for the creativity of their costumes?), so some additional revision or fine-tuning there would help get your point across a little cleaner.


Overall

Overall, I enjoyed reading this piece. You fit a lot of information and holiday elements into only a hundred words, which is quite a feat. Nice work!


I hope you've found this review helpful. If so, please consider paying it forward by reviewing the work of another Writing.com author! *Bigsmile*

Sincerely,

Jeff Author IconMail Icon
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15
15
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Free Folk  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)

Hi S.L. Key Author Icon

I discovered your item on Writing.com via random Read & Review and am sending the following feedback for your consideration.


Positives

I thought you did a good job with this item. There were a lot of characters to keep track of in a piece of this length, but I thought you managed it well and kept the reader's interest throughout. Well done!


Suggestions

No specific suggestions for improvement.


Overall

Overall, I think you did a good job with this piece. Nice work!


I hope you've found this review helpful. If so, please consider paying it forward by reviewing the work of another Writing.com author! *Bigsmile*

Sincerely,

Jeff Author IconMail Icon
"Rating & Reviewing Philosophy" Open in new Window.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
16
16
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Free Folk  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)

Hi Emberly Gray Author Icon

I discovered your item on Writing.com via random Read & Review and am sending the following feedback for your consideration.


Positives

I liked the structure and the imagery in this poem. I thought it was well written, evocative, and really did a great job of capturing the reader's imagination. Well done!


Suggestions

No specific suggestions for improvement.


Overall

Overall, this was an enjoyable, well-written poem. Nice work!


I hope you've found this review helpful. If so, please consider paying it forward by reviewing the work of another Writing.com author! *Bigsmile*

Sincerely,

Jeff Author IconMail Icon
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17
17
Review of Writing for Joy  Open in new Window.
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)

Hi The Uplifting Essayist Author Icon

I discovered your item on Writing.com via random Read & Review and am sending the following feedback for your consideration.


Positives
I like the message of this piece. It's always important to remember that feedback can have a dramatic effect on someone, and that - as a reviewer - you have to find the style of review that works for you, rather than trying to emulate someone else. I like the fact that this item contained a strong moral lesson in a narrative of so few words. Nicely done!


Suggestions
No specific suggestions for improvement.


Overall
Overall, I really enjoyed reading this piece. Good work!


I hope you've found this review helpful. If so, please consider paying it forward by reviewing the work of another Writing.com author! *Bigsmile*

Sincerely,

Jeff Author IconMail Icon
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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
18
18
Review of Final Target  Open in new Window.
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Bradbury Group & Bank  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)


*Shield1*    OFFICIAL JUDGE'S REVIEW    *Shield1*

Thanks for entering the October 2025 round of "The Bradbury Contest" Open in new Window.!

————————————————————

I enjoyed all of the action and excitement in this story. You did a great job with the pacing and keeping the narrative unpredictable with a lot of twists and turns.

Where I strugged a bit was with the characterization and the narrative tension. The mob offers Frank a job, offering to pay him money but also threatening him, and going back and forth. It seemed a little weird that, if they had leverage on him, they wouldn't just compel him to do it and save the money. It was a bit of a convoluted plot to set him up and fix his life completely only to ruin it for him again, when they could have just ruined his life from the beginning. *Laugh*

Overall, I enjoyed the read. I think there's some room for improvement if you ever revisit this story with an eye to rewrite, but it was a quick, entertaining read as it is. Nice work!

————————————————————


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
19
19
for entry "Cheating" Open in new Window.
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Bradbury Group & Bank  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (3.0)


*Shield1*    OFFICIAL JUDGE'S REVIEW    *Shield1*

Thanks for entering the October 2025 round of "The Bradbury Contest" Open in new Window.!

————————————————————

This was a fun flash fiction story. I always enjoy a good twist at the end and a play on expectations, which you did well in this story. I was hoping for a bit more detail to explain why he's not supposed to have coffee, and I would have loved a little more specific innuendo at the beginning to really play with the audience's expectations. But this was otherwise a very entertaining read. Nice work!

————————————————————


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
20
20
for entry "Eggs Gone Missing" Open in new Window.
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Bradbury Group & Bank  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)


*Shield1*    OFFICIAL JUDGE'S REVIEW    *Shield1*

Thanks for entering the October 2025 round of "The Bradbury Contest" Open in new Window.!

————————————————————

I enjoyed reeading this story. I noticed it was for OctoPrep so I'm assuming this is a vignette that's part of a larger story, and so I'll hold off on commenting about the narrative structure. Other than that, I thought the characters and the mythology were both interesting and this piece ultimately achieved its goal of making me want to read more of the story. Nice work!

————————————————————


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
21
21
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Bradbury Group & Bank  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)


*Shield1*    OFFICIAL JUDGE'S REVIEW    *Shield1*

Thanks for entering the October 2025 round of "The Bradbury Contest" Open in new Window.!

————————————————————

This was a great take on the prompt! There were so many aspects of the prompt to include, and you worked all of them into a framework that really made the most of all the different elements. Nice work!

The detail and description in the story was excellent, as was the relationship between Jon and Amy. You could feel Jon's excitement, and Amy's desire for him to be happy, even if she had misgivings about the event from the start.

I also really liked the twist ending, and how things resolved. You did a great job of establishing a ton of possibilities for what was going to happen, and still managed to surprise me with how it actually turned out. This was a great story!

————————————————————


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
22
22
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Bradbury Group & Bank  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)


*Shield1*    OFFICIAL JUDGE'S REVIEW    *Shield1*

Thanks for entering the September 2025 round of "The Bradbury Contest" Open in new Window.!

————————————————————


I really liked this take on a Jane Austen story. My favorite part were the two epilogues, one set twenty-five years into the future, and one set 250 years later, which gave great resonance to the events that had come before. Overall, this was an entertaining read and an excellent adaptation/reimagining of Austen's work. Well done!

————————————————————


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
23
23
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Bradbury Group & Bank  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)


*Shield1*    OFFICIAL JUDGE'S REVIEW    *Shield1*

Thanks for entering the September 2025 round of "The Bradbury Contest" Open in new Window.!

————————————————————


I like the idea of expanding on the characters and circumstances in a short story. Pride and Prejudice was a great choice, as it's immediately recognizable and has established characters, which allowed you to get right into the expanded story. This was an entertaining and well-written story. Nice work!

————————————————————


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
24
24
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Bradbury Group & Bank  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)


*Shield1*    OFFICIAL JUDGE'S REVIEW    *Shield1*

Thanks for entering the September 2025 round of "The Bradbury Contest" Open in new Window.!

————————————————————


I really enjoyed this story. You did a good job telling a compelling story, with characters that the reader cares about. Daniel tracking down his Myra was believable and realistic, and I thought you did a good job with the exchange between all three of the characters once he arrives at Trent's house.

For me, the ending felt just a little anticlimactic. You did such a great job of setting up the danger of this scenario Myra (and Daniel) find themselves in, but then they escape when Trent just wanders inside and stays there long enough for Daniel and Myra to escape. I was really hoping for a little more tension and conflict at the end of this compelling story.

Overall, though, this was an engaging, well-written story. Nice work!


————————————————————


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
25
25
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Bradbury Group & Bank  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)


*Shield1*    OFFICIAL JUDGE'S REVIEW    *Shield1*

Thanks for entering the September 2025 round of "The Bradbury Contest" Open in new Window.!

————————————————————


I enjoyed the worldbuilding in this story. There's a ton of potential for where this narrative can go, especially with all of the details you've built around the dragon mythology in this piece.

That said, it was missing that definitive beginning, middle, and end that defines a short story. As it is, this feels more like a vignette or a snippet of a larger narrative rather than a standalone story. I was hoping for a little bit more in terms of defined narrative to follow along with.

Overall, though, this was an easy, entertaining read. Nice work!

————————————————————


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
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