\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED ITEMS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://web1.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/ladym3575
Review Requests: ON
20 Public Reviews Given
20 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
Hi. I'm not super experienced with giving reviews so I stay away from technical stuff. I prefer short stories. I generally share what I liked and didn't like about the story. I usually give an example of what I think overall and whether or not it has grabbed my attention making me want more of the story. I hope to get more experienced so that I can be more helpful in the future
Public Reviews
1
1
Review by Temperance Stone Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
First impression:
The title interested me immediately and after reading your story I feel it is a great one.

What I liked:
Much of my writing focuses on addiction and recovery so I quickly related to your dad character.

Favorite lines:
"I went to sleep thinking how simple I would keep it if I could be married." I'm not sure that is possible. Hasn't been for me thus far. But your line offers me hope.

Below are my suggestion(s). Please use or ignore them as you see fit.
My only suggestion is to keep writing. I would love to read more of this story.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
2
2
Review by Temperance Stone Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
First impression:
Easy to read and relatable.
What I liked:
I really liked your honesty about your raw emotions. Thanks for sharing.
Favorite lines:
"I am those muscles you never used."

Below are my suggestion(s). Please use or ignore them as you see fit.
Personally, I would change the yellow font at the end. It's nearly impossible to decipher what is said.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
3
3
Review of Trail Hiking  Open in new Window.
Review by Temperance Stone Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
First impression:
I really like the descriptions of your surroundings. Having been to Paris myself, I was able to easily picture your scene.
What I liked:
Your connection to the world around you and hiking. Being outdoors is crucial for my peace of mind.

Favorite lines:
"I will, but not in the way that will have others worry. One can't get lost when you feel you've come home." I too am at "home" in the woods.

Below are my suggestion(s). Please use or ignore them as you see fit.
For me the ending was a bit abrupt. Other than that, I totally enjoyed this and felt connected to the setting.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
4
4
Review of My Child  Open in new Window.
Review by Temperance Stone Author IconMail Icon
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Good morning Sinbad. Interesting take on parenting. You've really got me thinking. My initial feeling is that I do not agree with some of the statements in the first verse. Of course, that just means that the chosen statements have different meanings to us. I love a thought provoking read. To me, one must foster (not the right word perhaps) the ideas in verse one to allow the ideas in verse two to occur. Verse three of course, should be universal. Either perspective, I loved this. Thank for for sharing


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
5
5
Review of The Chat  Open in new Window.
Review by Temperance Stone Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Good morning! Lovely little story. I especially like your use of the prompt "chat." Very creative.
Your last line " Savour every moment she could get away with anything" leaves me wanting more. I identify with Amy, being guilty of some boyfriend sneaking in my younger years, and would love to hear about her escapades. Thanks for sharing


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
6
6
Review of I HAD A FRIEND  Open in new Window.
Review by Temperance Stone Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hi Monty. I love this. The first few lines led me to believe you were speaking of another soldier. By the end, for me anyway, it was a verse to God. Either way, your words are powerful.

Truly appreciate your service to our country.
7
7
Review of The Visit  Open in new Window.
Review by Temperance Stone Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Good morning. Well done! Great imagery. I could see and smell the shack. I was able to feel her brother and his way his life. The ending left me wanting more. I want to hear her side of dining in a shack, rather than a mansion.

Great use of spacing. It is so much easier to read submissions with the paragraphs broken down, rather than the continuous lines in many submissions.

Thank you for sharing.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
8
8
Review of The Narrow Alley  Open in new Window.
Review by Temperance Stone Author IconMail Icon
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Good morning DyrHearte.

I truly love this piece. I often write about addiction and its recovery and this poem made me feel those feelings.

Certainly not assuming that is your topic. But, you've been heard. No matter your topic I understand and feel your words. Thank you so much for sharing
9
9
Review by Temperance Stone Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (3.5)
Good morning. As a mother myself I feel your emotion in this letter. The description speaks volumes. "A letter to my future kids about how I would love to be happy." A mother understands that our own happiness depends greatly on our children's happiness.

editing note: Was it meant to be typed twice?
Thank you for sharing
10
10
Review by Temperance Stone Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Kenzie. Absolutely beautiful. I too, spent many an hour drinking tea and discussing our faith with my grandmother. My Nana was a saint in my life and my entire family really. I also, had a neighbor who always welcomed us with snacks. All of the neighborhood children called he "Mother Goose." Your words were able to instantly bring me back to my younger years. I can taste the tea and hear Nana's voice. Thank you for sharing such poignant personal words. You've lifted my day.
10 Reviews • *Magnify*
Page of 1 • 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://web1.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/ladym3575