The Child That Might Have Been

A look back at a young girl's sorrow and how she overcomes it as she becomes a woman.

The Child That Might Have Been

Seeing your tears fall, brought back it all-
The joy, laughter, the ache of days gone by.
It made me pause and quietly ask why.


Those feelings I'd buried, long tucked away,
Suddenly struck like it was yesterday.
The happiness and hurt you brought into my life-
All of it returned, sharp as a knife.


A wide-eyed girl, untouched by pain,
Met you one day-sunshine, no rain.
So many dreams, innocent and true,
I opened my heart and gave it to you.


You showed me love - or so I believed-
As if the stars themselves had been deceived.
But one drunk night, you crossed the line.
Your breath reeked of rum. You stopped time.


The weight of your hands, the press of your skin-
I whispered no, but my strength wore thin.
Numb and still, I couldn't fight,
And what was once love vanished that night.


The years moved on; we went separate ways.
You found your light while I counted the days.
Stuck in a silence that screamed in my mind,
A hole so deep, no joy to find.


I stopped asking why and learned to survive.
Met someone kind who helped me revive.
He showed me love that was gentle and real-
A love that helped my soul finally heal.
We married, we laughed, we brought life anew-
Two children who taught me what I could do.
And when he passed on the Easter Day,
I found new strength to show them the way.


The fighter your built in me long ago
Rose from the ashes, refused to let go.
We faced the world with sorrow and grace-
And I held on, for them, in that empty space.


Then one crisp fall, I walked through the store,
And your voice-aged now-stopped me cold on the floor.
I turned and saw you: gray, not the same.
Older, softer, no longer the flame.


We stumbled through words, uncertain and slow,
Neither one sure what the other might know.
I prayed in that moment, humble and small,
That God would be near, hearing it all.


Maybe one day, you and I could sit-
Not to rewrite, but to finally admit;
The love, the ruin, the truth in between-
And grieve the child we both had seen.


To raise a glass not to regret,
But in compassion we won't forget.
To say, "We lived. We learned. We tried".
And cry for what innocence had to hide.


No more hatred, no more fear-
Just the quiet wisdom of every year.
And if a tear should fall, let it fall free,
For the girl I was- and the woman I came to be.


Seeing your tears fall brought back it all-
The joy, the laughter, the ache of days gone by.
And still I breathe deep, and whisper why.