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Rated: E · Poetry · Comedy · #2338861

I'm a poetic genius just ask me.

Prompt: The most absurd thing to say that is likely to make a mysterious stranger think you’re a poetic genius.
Line Count: 28
Word Count: 246

You don’t think I’m a poet? Oh please, have a seat.
Prepare to be dazzled. Prepare for a treat.
I speak fluent metaphor, bathe in a pun,
And I once made a haiku about a hotdog bun.

My verses are vibrant, like glitter on toast,
My similes sizzle (I brag, but I boast).
I rhyme things like “existence” with “persistence” and “distance,”
And once wrote a limerick about dental assistance.

You want proof I’m a genius? Well, here’s the good bit:
I once rhymed “platypus” with “existential grit.”
I’ve wept over stanzas (my own, if you must),
And signed all my napkins, “In Poets We Trust.”

My mind is a fountain, it spurts out pure gold.
I even write ballads when I’ve got a cold.
My muse is a wolf who howls at the moon,
We write Sestinas each Tuesday afternoon.

My notebook’s a jungle of wild, deep thoughts,
With doodles and sonnets and plots tied in knots.
I once wrote a verse that made me confused,
Which means it’s profound; with words never used.

Still not convinced? That’s okay, I forgive you.
It’s hard being brilliant; performing poetic jujitsu.
But someday you’ll say, “I once knew that freak!”
And I’ll rhyme that with “chic,” “unique,” and “oblique.”

And when I win prizes with poems absurd,
You’ll claim that you knew me back when I was nerd.
But genius, my friend, is a burden I bear,
In socks that don’t match and ink in my hair.


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