Forgettable

A lover's greatest fear is to be forgotten, despite knowing it's best for both parties.

I've always felt forgettable.
Invisible.
Unremarkable.
Unwanted.

I'd turned it all off.
Love was too hard.
Too disappointing.
Not meant for me.

The woman in me died; the light burned out.

The night I met you something sang in my heart.
But you were another's song to sing.
I put the lyrics in a box on a shelf for hiding.

Over time things changed.
We got closer.
The gazes longer.
The embraces tighter.

Surely this is nothing — or is it something?
I've been wrong before.
He seems different now.
Things feel different now.

And then you kissed me in the parlor.
Softly.
Sweetly.
Earnestly.

No longer did I wonder,
But there were so many questions.
Things became far more complicated.

The woman in me came alive; the flame burned brightly again.

I pulled the lyrics off the shelf and began to sing again.

You saw me.
You recognized me.
You wanted me.

But we cannot be.

My greatest fear is that you will forget me.

You need to forget me. I know that.
It's best for everyone if you do.
You must have a clear mind and sound judgment in this chapter of your story.

I cannot help but hope that your memories of me are as vivid and powerful as mine are of you.
I cannot help but know it's selfish to hope.

Unfinished, the lyrics are back on the shelf, my song quiet once more.
I dare not utter the desires of my heart. I will only say,

I want you to be happy.
I want you to be whole.
No matter what that means for me.